Saying NO is such an empowering experience.
Contrary to popular belief, saying NO does not limit you.
In fact, it opens new doors for you as you come from a space of worthiness and self-love.
Because each and every time you say NO to others, you say YES to yourself and your growth.
Allow me to share with you my take on the 5 times you must say NO in your life:
1.) When your life is at risk
This is a no-brainer. Don’t ever put yourself in such a situation that will compromise your safety. No amount of reasoning can be made that will justify you endangering or losing your life in the process. Trust your instincts and keep safe always. In all ways.
2.) When someone disrespects you
You are as worthy and lovable as everyone else. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel otherwise. Be confident about yourself. Speak up. Take a stand. And don’t allow others to own your space. You are fully deserving of your own, to begin with.
3.) When others dictate the life you must lead
Choose your own course. Pursue your own career. Follow your passion. Be whatever you want to be. That is your right. Don’t let anyone put you inside a box. You’re meant to be free. Keep it that way.
4.) When you are forced to stay in toxic relationships
Any relationship that you choose to have should be able to spark joy and growth. Say NO to those that hinder your growth and make you doubt yourself. Always remember that you have that choice to filter who you allow in your space.
5.) When you’re not your #bestmeever
Allow yourself to rest. To feel. To just be. It’s ok to say NO when you’re not your best. Give yourself enough time and space to reflect and recalibrate. You can always bounce back and start all over again when you’re truly ready.
After reading all these, I look forward to seeing you become comfortable when saying NO to these things happening in your life soon.
Happiness is a matter of choice.
And that’s a fact.
You see, things may not always go as planned and we might find ourselves disappointed in the process once in a while.
However, it doesn’t mean that we don’t have a choice to see beyond unfortunate situations.
A lot of times we have read time and again about tips on how to be happy.
However, what we tend to forget is that before we can even make happiness a habit, we must first consider where we associate it.
Let me tell you this now:
Stop associating happiness with things that have yet to come or happen.
Remove the context of attaching happiness to a goal, a person, a new relationship, an event which hasn’t arrived yet.
That’s the only way you can truly appreciate the now and come up with your own happy habits.
So once you’ve made that choice to be fully present in the moment, check out these happy habits you can create so that you always start and end your day with a smile.
It’s actually a continuation of the habits of genuinely happy people list I made before.
Why? because we can always have room for happy habits that make us smile and our hearts, overflow.
1.) Lend a helping hand
No one is too powerless to help others in need. A simple kind gesture can have a big impact on someone else’s life (and yours as well). Never underestimate your own ability to change someone’s life in an instant. Helping out does not always have to be grand always; even the smallest gestures count. What matters is the intention behind and how you can turn that to inspiration to create even bigger impact in the lives of others there after.
2.) Declutter your space
A beautiful space can be quite inspiring. Oftentimes, your space reflects your overall state so make sure that you do away with whatever no longer serves a purpose and keep those which continuously inspire you. Having a clean, well-kept space allows you to focus on what matters most: your well-being, happiness and your goals.
3.) Check in with yourself regularly
Allow yourself to acknowledge how you feel. Dn’t run away from your emotions. Instead, openly embrace them and then work around them there after. By recognizing them, you are able to keep yourself grounded and centered at all times, which helps make you genuinely happy and anxiety free, something that’s very timely amidst the pandemic.
4.) Let go of negative thoughts and grudges
Any form of negativity weighs you down and holds you back from becoming your own #bestmeever . So by consistently allowing yourself to let go of them, you create more space for more beautiful and inspiring things to come into your life as you become the person you’re meant to be.
5.) Amplify your strengths
It’s always such a pleasurable experience doing what you know you’re genuinely good at. Take time to practice every single day and allow yourself to confidently showcase your skills to the rest of the world. Sharing your gifts can help inspire others as well who are struggling with working on theirs.
I hope that these tips can help you build happy habits that work for you.
Looking forward to seeing you become happier in the days to come.
Life Changing.
Best way to describe the COVID19 Pandemic.
And to this day, I still think that’s an understatement.
While in general it is seen as something destructive and evil because of the results it delivered world wide — we tend to forget that underneath them all are silver linings waiting to be discovered.
I have always believed that things happen for a reason and this entire situation is meant to change the way we look at things and ourselves (even life) in general.
Yes, it taught me a whole lot of valuable life lessons which I now take to heart.
1.) Never take anything (or anyone) for granted
In an instant, lives are lost. Many became unemployed. We got locked down. Face masks and face shields became mandatory. With these sudden changes, I got to realize the things I was taking for granted: my freedom, my work, my health…among others. Such an eye opener. So best to show love and appreciation here and now. Make the most of today.
2.) Simple joys are real joys
Appreciate the small things. They bring you true happiness. Bonding with your loved ones. Being able to rest. Working from home. Having food on your table. How many times have we missed their true value? Larger than life if I may say. And priceless.
3.) We always have a choice
How we react or respond to the whole pandemic is a matter of choice. We can either see it as a dead end or as an opportunity to thrive. It’s a matter of allowing ourselves to accept the present scenario whole heartedly as we do away with resitance and grow with the flow instead. At the very least, you reading this now is a testament of your choices made: at the very least, to survive. And that will always be more than enough for now.
4.) Everyone can be a hero
Wherever you are, whatever you do, you can always make a difference during challenging times. No one is too big or too small to help and change lives. It’s all about being empowered within and building that sense of community so that no one gets left behind. And that’s such a beautiful space to be in: alongside people who chose to be the heroes that they truly are.
5.) Life goes on. And it can get better.
Life may not always seem perfect and things may not always happen as planned, but life goes on. And it can only get better when we allow ourselves to grow in harmony with it. It’s all about choosing to maximize each and every single day so that no matter what happens, we will have no regrets. These detours will lead us to beautiful destinations, one of which is towards our own #bestmeever .
There you go. So in your case, what has the whole COVID19 Pandemic taught you? Looking forward to hearing the lessons you’ve learned along the way.
There’s more to life than your work.
Like, seriously.
I want you to take this time to assess yourself: how many hours per day do you spend working?
How many hours do you have left to spend for yourself, your loved ones and things that matter to you in between?
If you’re having a hard time answering these comfortably, then it’s time for you to rethink your priorities, as you give yourself a much-needed break.
A break can mean anything from having a few minutes lounging around, getting a spa treatment, or finally going for that month long vacation in a place you’ve always wanted to visit.
1.) You are able to treat yourself with kindness
Self-care is key if you want to succeed in anything that you do. By listening to your mind and body and allowing yourself to relax and recalibrate, you keep yourself in tip-top shape holistically.
2.) Prevent unwanted burn out
Stress accumulates over time, most specially if you continuously immerse yourself in tiring situations. This leads you to hate whatever it is you’re doing and lose your drive over time. Yes, that’s a sign that you’re getting burned out. So it’s time for you to cool down and let yourself be so you get to decompress and let stress leave your tired body and soul.
3.) You get to pursue your passion
At the end of the day, it’s important to do things that make your heart sing and allow you to feel happy, complete and fulfilled. So take time to have breaks to pursue your passion and live your dreams outside of work. You will eventually realize that you’ve been missing on a far more beautiful experience for the longest time.
4.) You are able to nurture relationships around you
Work can pay the bills, but it won’t necessarily allow you to build lasting relationships with people who matter to you. So it’s very important to take breaks and just enjoy the company of people who have been with you through thick and thin, long before you have chosen to bury yourself with work. In the long run, these people have your back, which definitely can’t be 100% the same case with your work where everyone can be replaced by yet another new hire.
5.) You allow yourself to become your #bestmeever
Don’t ever let your work define who you are or what you can still be. Having breaks in between will allow you to discover more about yourself, gain clarity about what you really want and need so you can become the person you’ve always wanted to be.
I hope these reasons help you choose yourself and your over all well being more.
And you can always start by giving yourself what you deserve the most: a break from it all.
Don’t quit.
Oftentimes we are told that we have to fight long and hard for what we believe is worth it.
May it be a relationship, a career or whatever else we feel that used to make us feel happy, complete and fulfilled.
However, we must also bear in mind that people change. Things and situations, too.
So sometimes, our vision of a happily ever after gets distorted in the process.
And believing in fairy tales made us hold on and fight harder, until we get what we want.
However, what if it wasn’t meant to go that way?
Would letting go be an option?
At the end of the day, you can only do so much.
So allow me to share with you 5 signs that are telling you that it’s finally time to let go.
You are as important as anyone else. Don’t ever let your relationship or career make you forget who you really are and what you are meant to become. You owe it to yourself, as you give yourself the happiness you deserve. Don’t let anything or anyone disrespect you and make you doubt your worth.
If you are always in a constant struggle, fighting over even the littlest things, then maybe it’s time to reconsider. A toxic relationship or environment can never support your growth so why waste your time, energy and resources fighting just to survive? Choose to thrive there after, even if it means stepping outside of that toxic space.
If you have to continuously justify and convince yourself that something (or someone) is worth keeping, then take it as a red flag. It only means that you’re trying too hard to make things right (or at least make them appear fine) even if time and again you are left hurt, sad and completely broken by the very person (or career) you tried to protect.
Allow yourself to walk away if you have already given your all, your best at all times and yet nothing seems to really change. If you’re still subjected to lies, abuse or feeling inferior and unworthy time and again despite everything you’ve sacrificed just for you to stay, honey, take it from me: give yourself the respect and enough credit to just walk away. No more explanations needed.
If you are forced to compromise your values, do things against your will, commit self-harm or indulge in risky behavior that you’re not exactly accustomed to, then it’s time to take a step back (and away) from your current space. Nothing that brings out the worse in you can be worth it.
At the end of the day, remember that letting go does not always mean the end of something.
It can also signify the beginning of something far more beautiful than you have ever imagined.
Just trust yourself and the process more.
You’ll make it through.
As you become your own #bestmeever .
The only limitations that we have are the ones we put (and allow) on ourselves.
Come to think of it, that’s quite true.
Know that the life that we have, is not a result entirely of everything that happened to us.
Rather, it’s a result of how we chose to respond or react to all our experiences.
Admittedly though, there will be times when life seems unfair and at times it will throw us a curve ball that will make us feel overwhelmed and go off-track.
It is during those times that we feel stuck, lost and unproductive, thinking that progress is no where in sight and that it was the rest of the world’s fault, and never ours.
However, truth be told, we have everything it takes to keep going. To keep moving on and forward.
1.) Face your fears
Think about this: what can be the worst thing that can happen if you actually face whatever scares you most? And what’s the best thing that can happen if you do? Remember, the only way you can validate if one thing that scares you is really true or not is when you actually try and take that risk. And more often than not, you’ll find yourself thinking why you haven’t done it before, there after simply because whatever lies beyond fear has something to do with your growth.
2.) Remember your past successes
You’ve done it before. Whether it’s embarking on a new journey, starting all over again, having a new venture or overcoming obstacles, you have proven to yourself (and others) time and again that you have what it takes to really succeed. So trust yourself more and give yourself more credit when it comes to your ability to push forward. Your previous results can vouch for you.
3.) Do away with the distractions
I always share this to all my coachees and mentees: when it does not help you grow, let go. Simplify everything. Stop over thinking and just start focusing on what matters most: your happiness, your goals and your genuine fulfilment. Indulge guilt-free instead on self love and self care and always ensure that your whole well-being is at tip top shape, because at the end of the day, you have to focus on your most important investment in this journey: yourself.
4.) Be grateful for your progress
Every time you act in alignment with your greatest goals, whether it’s all about starting on a task, pausing to reflect or ending a toxic relationship that does not serve you well anymore…celebrate. Acknowledge that you are doing the best that you can with all that you have and that will always be more than enough.
5.) Surround yourself with inspiration
Whether you choose to embrace the love and support from your family and friends or take inspiration from random people, things and events in your every day life, what matters is that you keep each one in mind when the going gets tough. Hold on to your own “WHY” and always remember why you started. This will help you focus on the long and winding road ahead with a smile.
I hope these help you become unstoppable as you become the person you’re meant to be.
I am rooting for you.
Fact: It’s not easy to step out of our comfort zone.
Also a fact: It will always be worth it.
Because as they say, growth is found outside of your comfort zone.
However, most of the time, we allow ourselves to be overwhelmed by negative emotions brought about by the uncertainty that lies ahead.
What we fail to recognize in the process is that the uncertainty also brings about beautiful possibilities only if we choose to embrace the entire situation whole heartedly.
I remember the time when I was still starting as a professional life coach, after turning my back on a lucrative advertising and marketing career that lasted for 15 years, simply because I was no longer happy anymore after reaching my peak.
Back then, admittedly I was also scared and anxious, not knowing where my new calling will take me or how far I’ll go. What kept me going was that I held on to my purpose, which was to speak to inspire – and allowed it to motivate me all through out my journey towards becoming the Global Master Coach that I am now.
A lot of ups and downs along the way but hey, I wouldn’t have had it in any other way.
Life is too short to just settle in a space that no longer supports your happiness and growth. Visualize clearly what you want and paint that image vividly on your mind every single day because that will keep you going. Eyes on the prize always. I totally believe that if you truly want something, you’ll find a way to achieve it, even if it means stepping out of your comfort zone.
Each and every time you overthink, you cripple yourself with a bunch of fears and assumptions. Take that life changing first step instead. That’s actually the hardest part: to commit to starting. However, when you’ve finally decided fully and you have taken that first step outside of your comfort zone, there’s no where else to go but on and forward towards your own #bestmeever .
It may be a leap of faith for you as you embark on this new journey of yours but remember not to hurry and allow yourself to grow at your own pace. Instead of making big, drastic steps to hasten the process of pursuing your goals, focus on doing small, consistent ones and build up on them gradually. Don’t forget to be grateful along the way so that regardless of what happens in between, you will never feel that you lack anything.
Now this is tricky but very much possible. This can be done by seeing each and every experience as a wonderful opportunity to grow. When you change your perspective from being resentful to being open and optimistic, you allow yourself to thrive amidst the uncertainty that surrounds you at present. Remember, the key here is to listen to yourself mindfully: rest if you must, allow yourself to feel, celebrate wins in between, focus on what went right along the way and start all over again when ready.
As you step outside of your comfort zone, be sure to journey alongside people who genuinely believe in you and who help bring out the best In you. Having someone (or a bunch of people) cheer you on makes even the most difficult journey bearable. Just be sure to acknowledge them along the way and never forget that at the end of the day, apart from them, you should also be your own biggest fan.
I hope these inspire you to take that first step outside of your comfort zone simply because you are worth that risk and you definitely have what it takes to thrive thereafter.
Fact: You can’t be too ambitious if you’re 100% committed to your success.
Pursuing your biggest dreams isn’t that easy always.
Admittedly, there are a lot of challenges and struggles before you reach your goals.
Take it from me who was told time and again by a lot of people (seriously, I lost count) when I was starting my career from scratch that going global as a professional coach and as an author “was too big of a dream”.
For others yes.
But for me, it was worth the try.
However, what I realized was that you don’t have to stress yourself out and become too anxious in the process of fulfilling your ambition.
And yes, depression and success don’t necessary have to go hand in hand.
The solution though is not to minimize your goals, but rather, empower yourself to become bigger than your worse fears and anxieties.
Your biggest “WHY” will keep you grounded when the going gets tough. Always be inspired by that life changing reason that made you decide to embark on your awesome journey towards becoming the person you’re meant to be: your own #bestmeever .
The more you resist, the more it persists. So be open to changes, challenges and a whole lot of uncertainties in between. Instead of resisting your journey, embrace it fully and ask yourself what you can learn from each and every experience that you encounter along the way.
Ok, repeat this after me: “I am doing perfectly well.” Celebrate small wins because they are beautiful reminders that you’re getting closer to where you want to be. Whether it’s getting a random compliment, learning a new skill or simply making it through a difficult day, give yourself a pat on the back. You deserve it for stepping up and pursuing your own biggest dreams. Not everyone can do that and that gives you another reason to celebrate. Affirm yourself as often as possible.
Like seriously: comparing yourself with others is one of the biggest causes of anxiety. So please stop. Do yourself a favor and focus on yourself and your own growth. Do what you must, give your best always and stay committed to the results you want to achieve. Eyes on the prize, always.
Find your happy space. Be with people who make you feel loved and supported. Read about the inspiring stories of your role models. Look back gratefully at how far you’ve gone since you’ve started and recognize how much you’ve grown in the process. Create an environment that will help you thrive and make you realize that you don’t have to worry about what lies ahead. You got this!
There you go. I hope these inspire you to follow your heart as you pursue your biggest dreams.
You deserve it.
And they lived happily ever after.
Perhaps our favorite line in every fairy tale that we read.
After all, who doesn’t want to have a lasting relationship?
When you’ve found the one, I know that you’ll be more than willing to make things truly work out.
Allow me to share with you these 5 tips to help make your relationship last.
In order for a relationship to work, you guys must be on the same page. Don’t ever overlook the importance of reaching out and asking your partner about his/her needs and wants and allow yourself to share yours as well. Talk openly and honestly. Adjust accordingly there after based on your conversation. Allow yourself to give and receive the kind of love and affection you deserve.
Try new things. Or enjoy doing old ones. Explore and experience together. Never be too busy to be in love with that one person who changed your life. How can you support each other more as you get to know each other better while growing together? Keep that in mind.
Don’t let an argument make you forget the beautiful relationship that you have. Have enough time and space to reflect and understand the situation fully. Express your thoughts and apologize if needed. Forgive. Be more than willing to start all over again when you’re ready.
Don’t wait for any special occasion to show your love and affection. Make every single day special. Send sweet messages, surprise each other with random gifts. Hold hands. Give tight hugs. Make your partner feel special and remember all the reasons you fell in love with this person from the very beginning. Keep the fire burning.
I know that once you get in a relationship the assumption is that it has to be always about you both. But to be honest, that shouldn’t be the case. Allow yourself to have enough time and space and acknowledge your own needs outside the relationship. Become your own #bestmeever and allow your partner to do the same. Trust each other and know that by having that healthy space to grow individually as well, you become the best version of yourselves for each other.
I hope these will help you guys build that happy, stable, lasting relationship that you’ve always wanted.
Time to recreate your own fairy tale now.
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The other day, I woke up being told that I made it at #38 among the Top 100 Life Coach Website, Blogs and Influencers in 2021 globally.
My heart is beyond grateful and I am so honored to be included in this list.
So I got a lot of congratulations and comments telling me that I was already successful and that all my hard work is finally paying off.
And getting all those made me think hard: was I really successful?
If you would define success as being a 6-7 digit professional coach, having multiple best selling books and global features and interviews, numerous highly happy and successful clients, having a number of brand collaborations and paid workshops and talks left and right, while having a solid growing number of followers and supporters, then I guess I would say yes, I am successful based on those standards, solely based on facts and with my humility in tact.
However, coming from a space of honesty, I defined my own success this way:
Being able to have the time and means to pursue my passion and live my dreams.
Because at the end of the day, my life isn’t about what I can do, or what I have or what I have achieved.
It’s about how much I have allowed myself to just be.
And mind you, the entire journey wasn’t easy.
Yup, what you see now is just the tip of the ice berg of how a successful life coach can be like.
But what is not seen at the onset is how I had to spend a number of sleepless nights and days just as long, just to work on my craft to be able to deliver my key results consistently as I help others become their own #bestmeever .
1.) Build your credentials
Always be hungry to learn more about your craft. Explore multiple disciplines. Never be resistant to something unfamiliar. Be humble enough to start from scratch. As for me, even as a Global Master Coach, to this day, I still continue to study and get certified by reputable coaching institutions as I work on my rank promotion in the International Coach Federation. Never feel bad when you invest in yourself and your dreams. Oh and yes, I still have my own Master Level Coach as I mentor other coaches, even at present. Choose your mentor well and be willing to invest on them. My mindset: mistakes are too expensive for me and I can’t afford them so I would rather invest wisely on myself and my growth and on my mentor whom I have seen deliver the results I want.
2.) Strengthen your credibility
Ok, being good at what you do is one thing. Letting others know that you are is another. How much time have you spent in establishing yourself as an authority in your space? Take time to give high-value talks, write articles, post consistently, and most importantly, practice and ensure that you are able to deliver expected results from a professional perspective. Don’t just settle on having a certification or title: your credibility must be supported by your own body of work and the results which you have consistently (and successfully) given.
3.) Don’t ever make money as the basis of your practice
Always remember your why. Don’t ever make a client’s ability to pay as the basis of your performance as a coach. Whether it’s a paying client or a pro bono thing, always give your best. Don’t shortchange yourself and the client. The key here is to be able to hone your skills and test your own coaching programs time and again so that you would know if its doing its work or if you’re really hitting the right market. Treat everyone as a beautiful investment. After all, seeing someone else grow is such a rewarding experience so just make life coaching as a lifestyle so that it comes out naturally and not based on anything monetary. Oh, and client testimonials are priceless and referrals from them can open even beautiful doors for you in the long run.
4.) Never let rejections dishearten you
Fact: you can’t please everyone and not everyone is meant to be your coachee. And guess what? That’s ok. Take each and every NO as an opportunity to start fresh. Don’t ever take rejections too hard. It’s not always about you. In my case, trust me, when I was starting, I have gotten a lot. And in my current space, till now, I still do. But I’ve realized that it’s ok and I always try to learn from the experience and grow from it there after. Remember, if I hadn’t experienced all those rejections before while growing up, there will be no #bestmeever : no global coaching platform, no best selling books, no TED talks , no brand collaborations, no international podcast — and the list goes on.
5.) Be willing to take risks
Don’t let your fears get in the way of your dreams. So if you really want to make it as a life coach, embrace the uncomfortable. Don’t overthink opportunities given to you, instead, just go for them and make sure that you maximize each one along the way. Stop trying to fit in a mold and just allow yourself to grow as you are. Become that beautiful disruption that you are meant to be. That was what really worked for me: to be a Unicorn among the life coaches from all over the world. In your case, what should you allow yourself to be? Remember that authenticity can do wonders for you, big time. You are worth that risk.
So there, I hope that wherever you are in your journey as a life coach, these tips will help you become more successful in the process.
Thank you for being part of mine.
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