So at this moment, I want you to take a step back and reflect: what challenges do you have now in your space?
How are you dealing with them?
Whatever you’re going through right now, know that it’s ok. It’s part of your #bestmeever journey.
What is important now is to realize that you can actually turn your struggles into strength.
Here are 5 ways how:
Take note of the valuable lessons your struggle is teaching you
Here’s the thing: sometimes you will learn best the hard way. Take a look at your struggles now and identify any pattern present: are there difficult situations or experiences that are repeating itself time and again? It’s the Universe’s way of telling you that there’s an important lesson you need to learn so that it doesn’t happen again. Be open to seeking it and humbly receiving it so you can break the pattern and move on and forward from that particular struggle that has been holding you back for the longest time. Yep, until you learn, the struggles that carry the lesson will persist. And of course you don’t want that.
2. Consider the brighter possibilities
Oftentimes when we feel overwhelmed, we focus too much on what can go wrong and heavily anticipate for it to happen. Uhm. Stop. Don’t lose sight of the other side of the story which carries the probability of things working out in your favor. Never underestimate your 50% chances of winning, which you can only utilize as you come from a space of curiosity. Ask yourself this question: what if everything goes well after this? That way, you begin to see your struggles as stepping stones rather than huge blockages.
3. Recognize and act on your rooms for improvement
Struggling can be such a humbling experience. It teaches you to become more mindful about yourself and your growth. What you can do though is come from a space of openness and assess the areas where you’re struggling and what you can do to improve your chances of overcoming it. Do you need to upskill? Create a plan B? Have a change of mindset? Do what you must to apply necessary tweaks in how you deal with your struggles so you can get your desired different result.
4. Change your narrative
What if you knew that you have the power to change the way your story ends? How differently will you face your struggles at present? Try visualizing your desired outcome: if you weren’t coming from fear (or whatever negative emotion that’s holding you back), what will you do differently? How would you become the hero in your own story? Come from that space, as everything you need is already within you.
5. Practice gratitude
When you see the silver linings in your struggle, you get to appreciate them and the space you’re in more. We tend to forget how blessed we are at the moment because we focus too much on all the things that aren’t happening as planned. However, know that struggles pave way for us to become more mindful about what really matters in our lives. Think about this: would whatever is stressing you at the moment still matter in say a year’s time? Having that realization allows you to focus more on the things that really bring you genuine joy and fulfillment, something which you may have taken for granted whether knowingly or unknowingly along the way. And having that realization can be quite a game changer indeed.
Struggling is normal. So never feel that you’re alone in that part of your journey.
What is important here is that we make the most of each and every struggle that comes our way. Because for all you know, they are your potential strengths in disguise. Take time to really uncover them.
Currently in my self-work era. You read it right.
Actually, since last December, I have already decided on that the first quarter of 2025 will be spent on working on myself as I invest on my growth so I can be my own #bestmeever .
So I already made sure that everything was in place: lessen my commitments, free my schedule to insert new routines and time for learning, while giving my best to what’s on my plate as of the moment as I prioritize myself and my growth.
Admittedly, there’s one thing that’s still a work in progress at the moment.
And I am sure you can relate with me on this: it’s difficult to stay disciplined when times are harder than usual and temptations surround you 24/7.
Take this time to reflect: what situation challenges your discipline the most?
Dieting?
Use of social media?
Shopping?
Dating around?
Of course, whatever your answer may be, know that much like before and always, this is a no judgment zone.
What is important here is to be aware of situations that trigger our loss of our own self-discipline and how we can manage them better.
Coming from vulnerability, upon enrolling in my Kaizen program this year (it’s a 100 day fitness and personal development program), it has been quite a struggle for me to daily monitor my calories, work out and log everything I do and eat. Haha!
So in the beginning, I found myself just coasting by, letting myself give in to sweet treats and buffets once in a while. Fortunately though, 3 weeks now in the program, I caught myself and vowed to be more disciplined in my approach.
After all, it’s for myself and my growth.
And so far, it’s working for me.
Allow me to share with you 5 ways on how you can become more disciplined:
Have a crystal clear goal
Mandatory. I mean, you can’t practice discipline without knowing what the end goal will be. Make sure that your goal follows the SMART format (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, Time Bound) so that you get a clear picture of what you want to achieve. Don’t just settle for general terms like I want to be happy, to be fit, to get rich. Be as precise as possible so you can focus fully on achieving just that. Having a vivid vision of having my own best body ever with 20% body fat as I come from joy by May 1, 2025 is what kept me going as I do my daily work outs and observe what I eat mindfully. Funny thing is that last night, I had a glimpse of what it would look like in my dream. Manifesting. Haha!
2. Have a beyond compelling reason to achieve your desired goal
Ok. In my case, it’s not just about vanity. And it goes beyond being summer ready. My main reason is that my coaching platform, #bestmeever , is all about becoming one’s authentic, unapologetic, grandest version….which includes the physical, mental and emotional aspects as well, things which are also taken in consideration in the program I am enrolled in. I would want to walk the talk, thus I need to embrace my own journey towards becoming my best by humbly enduring the entire process, listening to lectures, doing the action steps in between and engaging with others in the program along the way so I can be of value to them and vise versa. Indeed, it’s very true that when days are harder than usual, when I am at the brink of just throwing in the towel, I always try to recall why I started and what is the value of all these for myself and my growth. Grounds me immediately, swear.
3. Develop a strategic plan.
No, I am not talking about mere bullet points or random words that inspire action. I am talking about concrete steps that will help you achieve your goal in mind. Being strategic means aligning each and every action, behavior and mindset of yours towards the fulfillment of your desired results. In my case, I plot my schedule accordingly to fit in my work outs and mindful breaks in between, while monitoring dutifully my calories intake and reflecting how I can still improve moving forward. Being disciplined in this case becomes easier for me as I have a structure to follow, versus before where in everything was merely dependent on my mood or what I felt like doing at that point in time. P.S. it also helps that you plan your small steps first while keeping in mind the big picture so that you don’t get overwhelmed in the process —something that causes one to lose track of his/her purpose and stray away from his/her goals. Start small and then when you’re ready, go big (I am not sure how this came out, haha!).
4. Honor yourself along the way
Give yourself more credit for doing all that you can, with all that you have. That will always be more than enough. Affirming yourself along the way can help you stay disciplined in the process as you don’t have to wait for anyone else’s validation or anchor yourself on desired results that have yet to come. Big or small, every win is worth celebrating. And oh, you can even be grateful for slow days as they give you the chance to reflect, recharge and recalibrate accordingly so you can bounce back even better than before. In my case, I always say “thank you” and “good job” to myself every after accomplishing a task or when I manage to fight off laziness when I need to do my morning cardio. And yes, most of the time, with discipline intact, I win over my bed’s call. Yey! Try sharing your wins too. It’s not being arrogant; it’s all about honoring yourself and inspiring others to do the same as they celebrate with you.
5. Surround yourself with accountability partners
Police. This is what I call people who have my back whenever I feel like going astray. Involving your family, friends, significant other or whoever else that can keep a watch on you can do wonders for you and your journey as you stay disciplined in pursuing your goals. Taking inspiration from them and giving value to their words of encouragement and support can keep you going even during the toughest days. I like the set up that we have now in the Kaizen community where in we have accountability buddies and our designated coach (Shout out to Ciento Por Ciento and Coach Ben) whom we can reach out for support when reaching our targets daily become challenging and the cravings beyond bearable. Haha! A wonderful bonus also that the entire community is filled with like-minded individuals who are more than willing to give a helping hand or a word of encouragement as needed. Who can ever go astray with all eyes on you? Thank God for the amazing support system.
Working on one’s self requires a whole lot of time, effort, resources and discipline.
Hopefully, after reading this, you will have all in your current space as you work on the person you’re meant to be. Your own #bestmeever. Let’s continue happily with our journey!
“Always be nice.” I think this is one of the most misunderstood statements our parents and teachers have told us through the years.
I mean, if you were like me, I used to interpret that as you always have to obey others, conform with the norm and say yes to everything thrown at you.
It didn’t help that statement was further reinforced with punishments when not observed accordingly based on the expectations of others.
You see back then I equated being nice with having no boundaries and pleasing others all the time so I can get the validation I wanted.
And looking back, it didn’t do me any good at all.
In general, people pleasing makes you forget your own value as you struggle to meet the needs and wants of others while setting aside your own.
This leads you to believe that validation can only come from external sources e.g. family, friends, significant others or even random strangers which make it totally unhealthy and unsustainable as you drain yourself in the process.
In the same regard, unknown to many, people pleasing also amplifies one’s ego, making a person think that he “actually looks good in the eyes of others as he does what is right and due”.
No truth to that at all.
So now, I would like to clear the definition of being nice.
Being nice means giving yourself what is due so you can do the same for others without compromising your self-worth.
There I said it.
Now, if you’re having a hard time letting go of people pleasing, here are 5 ways to help you do so:
Remember that you can be kind and have boundaries
Kindness is a two way street. Give yourself what you’re willingly giving others. Being kind to yourself means acknowledging your own needs and wants without feeling guilty, so you will be able to whole heartedly provide for others coming from a space of inspiration instead of obligation. After all, you can’t pour from an empty cup.
2. Allow yourself to disappoint others
Hear me out on this: if disappointing others means you are able to give yourself the kind of love and care that you deserve, so be it. At the end of the day, you don’t want people to stay in your life just because they benefit from you. Check on the relationships you keep — who are really there for you through thick and thin? Those people will understand if you choose to attend to your personal needs as well because they value you outside of what you can do for them. Also, in general, audience impact is only 10% in any criteria for judging so don’t worry about not getting the nods of others who don’t deserve to be in your space. Haha!
3. List down the things that make you feel good about yourself
As we focus too much in pleasing others, at times we forget how amazing we are. So it’s best to create a list of your achievements, skills and talents and include anything and everything else that makes you appreciate yourself more. You are far valuable than you can ever imagine and as you come from a space of self-worth, you do away with the need to get any validation from others there after. There is so much power when you affirm yourself.
4. Surround yourself with people who are genuinely there for you
Be with people who treat you like you genuinely matter. They are the ones who can inspire you to keep moving forward when saying NO becomes tougher than usual or when you see yourself falling into the spiral once more of people pleasing. Have people check in on you and be sure to be brave and humble enough to seek help when needed. You deserve to be seen, heard, felt and celebrated as you are. Never forget that.
5. Invest on yourself and your growth
Oftentimes, we find ourselves wanting to compensate for our own insecurities by pleasing others, hoping that their approval will make our self doubts go away. However, that isn’t exactly the case. Dealing with your own insecurities so they don’t take the lead in your relationships is imperative. This simply means that you should be willing to work on yourself as you invest on your self and your growth. How can you take care of yourself better? What do you need in order to grow more? Whether it’s a time off from everyone around you, or learning a new skill or finally deciding for yourself…do it. That way, you get to discover and become your own #bestmeever regardless of what others may have to do or say. You don’t need their approval anyway.
To know your true worth, you don’t have to please people to get their validation.
You just have to inquire within and appreciate yourself as you are. You matter. Always. In always.
“As the saying goes….” Followed by a quote to justify whatever argument is being presented. Sounds familiar, right?
I am sure you have heard this time and again from your parents, friends, work mates, or even random acquaintances.
Normally this statement pops up when someone wants to remind you of something, hoping that a quote can influence you to do just that or when a point has to be further emphasized.
Take this time to reflect: in your space, what old sayings did you frequently hear? How did you take them?
Now before you start overthinking again about your response, please take this to heart:
Those sayings are subject to your own interpretation.
After all, it’s your own journey. Your rules. Your take on things too.
In my case admittedly, while growing up I subscribed to majority of how the old sayings went, thinking that a bunch of wise words from someone I don’t even know will do the same wonders it did for them perhaps.
However, as life happened, I realized that by having much self-awareness, and coming from a space of authenticity, I can choose how to reframe the statements to best fit any given situation I am in.
That, my friend, can be such a liberating and empowering experience indeed.
Allow me to share with you the my 5 new takes on old sayings I grew up with:
Fake it till you make it TO Face it till you make it
You all know by now how much I value authenticity. I totally believe that by embracing your truth you allow yourself to humbly accept your current space. By doing so, you become 100% present which can help you think of strategic ways to go about a certain situation as you recognize what is here and now. Hiding behind a facade can only take you on a short distance and can be quite tiring as you struggle with what is real and what is not. Don’t wait for the the guilt or shame to get to you. Face your challenges head on, with all that you are and all that you have at that given point in time. That will always be more than enough, regardless of the results you get. Because at the end of it all, it becomes a learning (and growing) experience for you.
2. Don’t burn bridges TO It’s ok to burn bridges as youbuild better, more meaningful ones.
Fact: Not everyone will be part of your happily ever after. Know that everything happens for a reason so just embrace things as they are. Let them (and yourself) be. You have to be brave enough to let go of things (and people) who no longer spark joy or if your what could have been(s) are weighing you down. Be grateful that once in your life you had that beautiful relationship of whatever kind happen in your life. That was its part of the story. It ends there as you learn and grow from the lessons it taught you. However, as you close chapters, realize that by doing so, you open up space for better things (and people) to come into your life. Life goes on. And so can you, even with the bridges you burned because they led to nowhere. Keep on building better ones of greater value which you deserve, ones that can help you become your own #bestmeever .
3. Save the best for last TO Enjoy the best here and now
While people judge an experience based on expectations about it being on a high note, there is so much beauty in just indulging in the now, being 100% present and rewarding yourself simply because you deserve it. Never attach your happiness or rewards for yourself to a certain goal achieved or milestone reach. Who says you can’t wear your nice clothes on an ordinary day or use your expensive China silver ware when there are no visitors? When will you embark on that much deserved vacation and allow yourself to have a break from it all? You see, here’s a common misconception: that we have all the time in this world. Not true at all. No one knows about what the future may bring. So why not just live in the moment as you take responsibility for yourself and your actions? Pursuing big goals doesn’t mean you have to postpone your happiness along the way. And yes, you can finally eat that box of expensive chocolates inside your refrigerator. Haha!
4. Actions speak louder than words TO Actions and words should equally speak as loud
Yep. For me, one is not more important than the other as they both have the same impact on people. Ever heard of love languages, communication and learning styles? It differs from one person to another. Thus, it’s best if you put equal importance to both your words and actions. Casing point: you need words to inspire, talk sense and motivate people as you show them your intentions. On the other hand, you can’t just rely on actions alone to cover for what’s unspoken and give the necessary explanations, level expectations and to address difficult conversations. And vise versa. So never take for granted one over the other.
5. Forgive and forget TO Forgive and never forget the lessons
I don’t know if it’s just me but I really don’t believe that when people offend you, you should just bury the hatchet and forget it ever happened. For me, it seems like you were invalidating your own feelings and thoughts them, making them as if they were less important than the situation on hand. I beg to differ though. I do believe in the power of forgiveness, but I also embrace the value of taking life lessons to heart and never forgetting them. Forgiving someone does not mean you have to share spaces with them and bring back things as they were before. You just can’t. There were learnings….and hopefully growth. Come from that space. You are not starting from ground zero up this time around; you are starting from experience. The goal here is to make the most of that new space, respect boundaries and allow things to unfold without putting too much pressure in bringing them the way they used to be. Who knows, going with the new may allow you to end up with something better and more valuable.
I know these may be too much for you to take, but hey, try to gain your own insights through them.
You don’t have to agree with me. I know for a fact that these might be a not so popular take on things.
And that’s ok. What is important is that you get new insights for your consideration.
As the saying goes, you know what’s best for you. Keep it that way.
Starting all over again isn’t exactly a walk in the park. Truth be told, that’s actually an understatement.
I mean, let’s be honest: who wants to start from scratch anyway?
Especially if you have invested so much time, effort and resources into building something which unfortunately didn’t work out as planned.
And a bunch of other stuff that required you to build yourself (and your broken self esteem) from ground zero up once more.
Consider this though: starting from scratch isn’t all that bad, most especially if you see the value in doing so.
Remember: starting all over again allows you to rebuild your life exactly the way you want it to be, as you considered all the lessons you have learned from things that initially fell apart.
Yep, they had to happen so that you will have a clearer idea of what can still be improved in your space so that you eventually end up with the life you want and deserve as you become your own #bestmeever in the process.
If you are in the midst of re-writing your own story and encountering difficulty in coping as you do so, here are 5 ways to make starting all over again easier:
First things first: embrace change whole heartedly
Stop resisting. Trust the process. Acknowledge the space you’re in and come from humility and openness. Remember: you can’t make the most of your journey if you keep on running away or fighting back the experiences that will help mold you into the person you need to become for your next chapter. Do away first with your biases and assumptions because they blur beautiful possibilities and instill unwarranted fear.
2. Stop obsessing over the past
Psst. It’s over and done with. There’s nothing you can do to bring back time. And you shouldn’t even try. Channel all your what could have beens to what can still be as you focus on the now. Be at peace with letting go knowing that all things that have happened (and the relationships that you had) already served their purpose. Let them be as you set yourself free from all the things weighing you down so you can create more space for better things to come into your life.
3. Determine how your next chapter will look like
Without any clear goal, starting all over again isn’t really possible. I mean, knowing where you want to go and vividly having an idea of your desired next chapter allows you to plan your next steps based on what is still under your control. In the process of visualizing your desired new story plot, make sure you don’t limit yourself based on what you’ve been through or going through at present. Both will change, depending on the work you put in as you move forward. Explore possibilities. If nothing can stop you and everything is possible, how will your next chapter be like? Reflect. And make sure it’s one you truly like.
4. Dream big, start small
Don’t overwhelm yourself with the grandness of your desired next chapter. Chunk down your action plans into small steps. Be mindful about going at your own pace as you focus on your own goals and space. Also, know that your progress isn’t determined just by the steps you take forward, but rather, even as you pause or completely stop to reflect and recalibrate, you’re actually growing. So be kinder to yourself as you just do what you can with all that you have. That will always be more than enough.
Knowing that you are not alone in your journey can do wonders for you. Involve people who are closest to your heart in your journey and let them shower you with that much needed and deserved love and support when days seem tougher than usual. Celebrate with them your progress and allow them to inspire you as you move forward in life. You may want to document your journey as well and share it to the rest of the world, because for all you know, you are the inspiration someone, somewhere out there, needs at this point in time. You, moving on, has a purpose too.
To move on and start all over again is a matter of choice. One that you truly deserve to give yourself. And that starts by committing to starting all over again. May this demarcate your Day 1.
Fact: Not everyone will be happy for you when you succeed. Also a fact: You can’t force these people to change.
There, I said it. Now take it all in.
I know. And I totally get you.
Been there. Been that.
And to be candid about it, as I continue journeying towards my own #bestmeever , I continue to experience that still.
What I have come to realize about the entire experience of growing into the person you’re meant to be is that some people will not be able to grow in harmony with you.
As you soar higher in this life time, some will get left behind.
Sadly though, regardless of the relationship you have with them, these will be the very same people who will try to minimize your success.
I have heard (and been told upfront) these before:
“Only bronze?” – when I first placed in the 2022 edition of the Coach Awards in the Best Wellness Coach Category.
“He just probably paid for his awards and articles.” – when I got recognized by a number of international media and organizations for my work and got included in their listicles.
“You charge too much.” – from a person who hasn’t even tried my services and didn’t bother reading the testimonials of my clients
“He’s not that big time yet globally.” – said someone about my international exposures and clients.
“He’s just charming and the audience loves him that’s why he gets invited often” – said someone who questioned my multiple media exposures and subject matter expert interviews.
“National Bookstore? Only ranked #9. It’s just Amazon. Anyone can best selling author there.” – said someone who had a self-published book which barely made any sales.
And I can go on and on from the years of experiencing such.
And I know you can relate too.
When people tell you that you aren’t good enough.
That you had it easy.
That your achievements don’t really matter that much.
But let me tell you this now: that isn’t exactly the case.
Allow me to share with you the 5 things you can do when someone minimizes your success:
Remind yourself that you define your own success
Success is relative. And it’s not just anchored on huge milestones or achievements. Success can mean as much as starting your own fitness journey, saying NO for the first time or simply making it through the day. You define it. Never let others implement ridiculous metrics that you don’t even subscribe to.
2. Don’t carry the weight of others’ projections on you
When people try to bring you down, it stems from their own insecurities, frustrations and pains. Really successful and genuinely happy people don’t have time to minimize the success of others simply because they have so much joy in their space and they are very much secure to let others share spaces and grow in harmony with them. In my case, I always reflect: what can be their reason for doing that? What pain is driving their action? For all you know, they probably want your success for themselves. Or they try to bring you down because they feel they’re being left behind. That makes me feel compassion than resistance while letting go of the unnecessary baggage their comments bring. And yes, you don’t need to deal with their pains. It’s theirs to carry and process.
3. Reflect: What’s the value of their comment in your journey towards growth?
Oftentimes, the people who belittle you and your success don’t really have that much value in your life. Total strangers. Acquaintances. People you had a fall out with. So…why would their opinion matter? The mere fact that they didn’t have any significant contribution to your growth, why be burdened by what they have to say? You don’t have to take in everything and you don’t have to explain yourself.
4. Focus on those who truly value and celebrate you
You don’t deserve to be held back from becoming your best by anyone. So instead on dwelling too much on the approval and validation you never got, focus on all the kind words and gestures from people who genuinely love and support you. Their presence in your life weighs more. Reflect: who are these people in your life who truly have your back? Keep them closer.
5. Continue celebrating your success
Huge trigger for those who want to bring you down, if I may say. When you are very much secured about yourself and you have the purest intention of inspiring others as you share and celebrate success, its value amplifies. Someone out there needs to see you push forward so he/she will also be inspired to take his/her first step towards growth even if some people are making things harder than usual. Play the part. Be the disruptor. Show others how it’s done. Succeed even more. Consistency drives nay sayers beyond crazy. Best clap back ever without lifting a finger.
Wherever you are now, I hope you become more comfortable in acknowledging your own worth and success.
You don’t need anyone else to be proud of you to validate your progress and significance in this life time.
You matter. Everything about you does.
Take that to heart always as you give yourself the success that is due.
I will always be proud of you. Now, be proud of yourself too.
There’s something about wanting to start the year right by turning a new leaf.
Quite timely and relevant if I may say.
I mean, after learning all the valuable lessons from the year that was, I am sure that when you take them to heart, you get to become your #bestmeever in the process.
Speaking of becoming better, the new year I believe is also the perfect time to explore and try out new things as you align yourself with what is dearly true to you.
So before even coming from a space of resistance or fear, try to consider this: you have nothing to lose but much to gain if you focus on (and commit to) improving yourself in the year to come.
Here are 5 new things you can explore this new year to help you as you continue to journey towards your own #bestmeever:
A new skill
Upskiling can do wonders for you, not only in terms of your career but also in terms of having personal fulfillment. Time to reflect: what skill do you need now that can allow you to upgrade your life? In my case, year on year, I try to get myself certified and trained for a new coaching discipline or any other complimentary skill that I can use in my coaching practice e.g. utilizing a new app etc. Whatever that may be, it’s never too late to learn it and use it moving forward. Just make sure you’re also interested in it and fully committed to the skill on hand so you don’t waste your time and effort.
2. A new hobby
Focusing too much on work can burn you out. Try to find a new hobby that you think you will truly enjoy and can help you decompress and relax amidst the your busy schedule. My suggestion: think of a hobby that can bring out your creativity. Or one that can help you earn money. Or even one that simply fills your heart with joy and fulfillment at the end of the day. It will be beautiful if you find all of those in one particular hobby. So whether that’s painting artworks or working out at the gym or even traveling, do what you feel your heart is telling you to do. It will lead you to what you truly need.
3. A new job
I have been out of the corporate setting for over 2 decades now so is resigning during December after getting the bonuses still a trend? Haha! Please enlighten me. But hey seriously, I think more than just getting the bonuses, I feel that the holidays have allowed people to reflect fully on what truly matters to them and what job makes their heart skip a beat. I will say this again: it’s never too late to start all over again and pursue a career that you find most meaningful. I mean, look at me: I traded my corporate hat before as a marketing and advertising executive to become a full-time professional coach. I mean admittedly the entire journey wasn’t a walk in the park but hey, looking back, it was one of the best decisions I have ever made because I get to do what I love most, have time and location freedom and feel genuinely happy and fulfilled as I change lives of others on a daily basis. So yeah, maybe this is the sign you’re looking for to finally give your CV a much-needed update and boost.
4. A new relationship
Ok, before you raise an eyebrow, it’s not just really about a romantic relationship. But hey, no one’s stopping you though if that’s what you truly want and you’re really ready to have one. A new relationship here can mean redefining your current one, whether it’s on a romantic, familial or work note. It can even refer to the one you have with yourself. The key here is to reflect on this question: what can make my relationship better? Answer honestly and give yourself whatever it is you need there after simply because, you deserve to grow in harmony with all the relationships you choose to keep.
5. A new mindset
“Whether you’re wrong or right, if you believe it, you’re right.” Can’t agree more. The new year presents a beautiful opportunity to check on your belief systems that no longer work for you or your mental patterns that hold you back. Allow yourself to come from a space of honesty and vulnerability so you can fully identify and address your mindset concerns. Consider the new year as a fresh start. However, mind you though: changing your mindset does not have to be scheduled during the new year alone – it’s actually a continuous process all year round and beyond. The key here is just to allow yourself to finally start seeing (and doing) things differently so you can have a different set of results too in your life.
As we welcome the possibilities that the new year brings, may you embrace the new things that can make your 2025 your best year ever yet.
Wishing you the best in 2025 and looking forward to seeing the new you!
It’s better to give than to receive. One of the most popular quotes I grew up with.
Admittedly though, however, planning what to give people this Christmas can be so stressful at times.
A lot of things to consider: the likes of the person, the budget, how to wrap it, where and when to send it….and the list goes on.
Ok, before you judge yourself: you are not over reacting. You only want what’s best for the recipient of your gift. Of course you want that person who means a lot to you become genuinely happy and feel appreciated fully.
I mean, at the end of the day, it’s not about how grand your gift is; it’s about how heartfelt your intentions are behind what you’re giving.
Allow me to share with you 5 special gifts you can give this Christmas:
Time
Time is the best gift you can give anyone, whether during Christmas time or not. Trust me, your presence means a lot. There are people who get so lonely during the holidays and no material gift can take the place of someone’s good company. Brave the traffic. Invite people (or yourself) over. Just be there to celebrate the holidays with people who are closest to your heart. It can change their lives. And yours too.
2. A hand-written love letter
It’s very rare nowadays to see long, love-filled letters from the heart so receiving them can be quite a pleasant surprise. I don’t know about you but there’s something about reading hand-written letters that makes me feel warm and appreciated all over. I like the rawness of the thoughts and the idea that the person giving it to me was writing it coming from an inspired space. All you need is a clean sheet of paper (if you still have stationaries, please—another rare gem!) and your trusty pen (I like mine in different shades which don’t blot) plus a nice, cozy space where you can pour your heart out as you write the most beautiful love letter yet.
3. Something you made by yourself
It’s time to put your skills and talents into meaningful use! Draw an artwork. Record a song. Compose a poem. Bake a cake (yummy). Create a video greeting. Whatever it is you’re good at (or even if not!), you can always create something beautiful if it comes from the heart. As they say, it’s the thought that counts and for sure your efforts will be greatly appreciated because those types of gifts give lasting impressions.
4. An opportunity to grow
Growth is one of the best gifts you can give to another person as it lasts long after the holidays are over. Whether it’s a pre-paid coaching program or a gym membership or even a self-care package , all these can help improve the overall wellness and well-being of your loved ones, allowing them to grow in harmony with life, no matter what space they’re in at present. Wouldn’t it be amazing to be part of someone’s milestones? You can be just that.
5. A prayer
It’s a divine experience knowing that someone prayed for you or offered their intentions during mass for your safety and wellbeing. I don’t know about you but it makes me feel so loved when someone tells me that he/she prayed for me. The good thing about this is that this gift is not religion centric; you can practice your faith and pray for your loved ones to whomever you believe is your diving being. With the clearest intentions, I am sure your prayers will be heard one way or another. Another plus: you can do this at your convenience, when you’re 100% present.
I hope my list today gave you an idea on how you can make the holidays for others even more special.
Remember though, while you have the power to give these beautiful gifts to others, you can also gift yourself with the same, by choice. You are worthy, much like everyone else, to have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
Time is gold. I think that is one of the most famous quotes I grew up with.
However admittedly, back then when I was younger, I used to appreciate it on a superficial note.
As a mere answer to an autograph book question or to have something “profound” posted on my wall.
Through the years though, I saw it differently as I aged.
Much like how brought that to the surface when a coachee of mine submitted a list of his, 8 minutes past our agreed upon deadline.
While he had his own reasons, I wanted him to reflect on a question that perhaps can change his view about time (and life ) in general:
What do you think is the value of 8 minutes in your life?
And that led to a deeper understanding and appreciation of his commitment to himself and his growth.
I think through the years, with heightened awareness and new sets of experiences, I began to appreciate the value of time at its core, something which I impart generously to all of my coachees and mentees as they work on becoming the person they’re meant to be.
And I don’t just mean long term or seasonal changes brought about as time goes by. I also see value in each and every second that passes my life by, making sure that no time is wasted just because of uncalled for reactions towards unforeseen events.
Don’t get me wrong: not wasting time does not mean you always have to be on the go, moving forward and chasing your goals relentlessly. It’s all about the mindful use of time, no matter how long or short and that may be. And being mindful about it means making the most of it, whether resting, pausing or just letting yourself be in between pursuits of your dreams.
Being mindful means observing and sticking to your commitments, not only to others but also to yourself and your own growth. It’s all about intentionally finding time to do and give what is due so that you become your own #bestmeever no matter how busy life may be.
It’s all about becoming 100% present always as you go through life so that you get the most of each and every moment as you learn and grow in the process from all things, good or bad, that happens to you and for you.
It’s all about allowing yourself to feel, whatever it is that you need to acknowledge at any given point in time without judging yourself because you are entitled to that. What is important though is that as you set yourself free to express your emotions, it is imperative to practice accountability towards them too. At the end of it all, it’s never an excuse to let others around you suffer just because you were having a bad day. Take that to heart.
It may seem so trivial now to focus on just 8 minutes and make it seem like it’s larger than life, when we oftentimes take it for granted. However, truth be told, it is.
Imagine this: what can happen within 8 minutes? Reflect on your current space and see for yourself how valuable time can be.
You see, it can mean different things for different people:
…it can be life changing for a mother who gets to see her child for the first time after the long labor;
…it can heal wounds for someone who’s dying and wanted to make amends with his family and friends before going;
…it can make or break a much-awaited opportunity that’s presented;
…it allows for longer expressions of love between people.
And the list goes on.
What I am saying here is that 8 minutes isn’t exactly just a minuscule of time.
Depending on how you see and use it, it can be life changing. And believe me, that’s an understatement.
So at this point in time, I hope you see the value in each and every moment you have as you celebrate every breath you take.
You deserve to live fully. To become your own #bestmeever . You just have to give yourself time. And fully committing for 8 minutes to whatever it is that will bring you growth and joy, for starters isn’t bad at all.
Because that can jumpstart something big for you in the long run.
P.S. My coachee now submits way ahead of his scheduled deadline and found new inspiration along the way. My heart is happy, full, and proud. Thank you for the inspiration.
….forgot the password to your account which got locked?
…had something stolen from you?
How did you deal with it?
Whatever your response then, it’s ok. You still have time to tweak it as you read this.
Yup, it was a learning experience for me yesterday, and until now as I troubleshoot and write this.
Sharing with you the 5 ways you can deal with a sudden loss:
Don’t panic
I know. It can be so stressful. But think about this: panicking won’t help you in the process. In fact, making impulsive decisions can wreck even more havoc in the long run. The key here is to pause and ground yourself so that you can think of a logical situation when all your emotions have stabilized. Taking deep breaths can do wonders for you.
2. Assess the situation carefully
After recognizing your emotions and letting them settle, try to see the situation on hand objectively. What is the implication? What can you be missing out? What must you consider? What can be good about this? I had to answer all those 4 when I was trying to pacify myself yesterday and it gave me enough leverage to come up with what will work best for me at that given point in time.
3. Let go of anything beyond your control
This is a golden rule. I mean why continuously stress over things (and people) you have no control of? Stressing over them won’t change a thing and it won’t definitely guarantee you the desired outcome you want. Remember: you spend precious energy as you try to control everything. What you can do is utilize the same amount of energy and effort in letting go and focusing on what you can still influence as of the moment so that you don’t go around in circles.
4. Seek help
You are never alone and it’s ok to seek for help because that’s a sign of strength. Give yourself the assistance you deserve by acknowledging the fact that sometimes you can’t do things on your own. I immediately reached out to my web developer and to a couple of techie people I know for help and the guidance they gave me allowed me to formulate my options moving forward.
5. Check on your priorities
Based on your assessment of the situation, what should you focus on first? Again, it’s imperative to let go of all the distractions so that you can create a strategic pathway towards the soundest solution you need and want for yourself. Consider the help you have received and know that at the end of the day, you can only do so much so working on resolving one thing at a time is best. In my case, my priority was to inform everyone affected by the loss of my email and give them an alternative email where they can reach me instead. I am lucky though that people I reached out too were kind enough to understand the problem and were willing to make necessary adjustments.
You might be curious about my own resolution. Well, what I did was get myself a new domain hosting and service. You can now reach me at myke@bestmeever.net 🙂
I can definitely say that after 5 years, I am at peace with letting go of my previous domain, bestmeever.com. I will always be grateful for it served its purpose well and has been instrumental in receiving numerous good news and blessings through the years. Thank you.
However, life goes on. And so can I. Still on my way to becoming my own #bestmeever . With my new email address.
