It was a very colorful event, so to speak.
Both literally and figuratively if I may say.
So I just came back from my stint as a keynote speaker in the Sorsogon Pride Summit (thank you to the Provincial Government of Sorsogon for having me), as part of the celebration of the 2024 Kasanggayahan Festival
.
And I must tell you, even if I have done a lot of talks and advocacy work geared towards promoting inclusivity and diversity for the LGBTQIA+ community, this experience opened my eyes to new possibilities.
You see, it was the first time I saw kids (I assume they were just around 11-13 years old) participate actively in the summit. And I kid you not when I say that their make up and get up would put even the best contestants of Ru Paul’s Drag Race to shame.
I was in awe of their confidence and how comfortably they expressed themselves based on what was true for them and not on what the society expects, something which, in other places or circumstances, will get raised eyebrows and heads shaking with disapproval.
And yet there I was, beaming with pride, as I welcomed them onstage during the awarding ceremony of the program, wherein each LGBTQIA+ group who participated were duly recognized for their support to the said event.
For a moment, I reflected: how would things look for me now if I had the same courage and support from all the people around me back then when I was struggling to figure out who and what I was while growing up?
Would life have been better? Happier? Would I still have journeyed towards my own #bestmeever ?
I wouldn’t know now for sure. My journey growing up in a time when being gay was quite unacceptable and anyone who did not conform with the societal norm was ostracized and ridiculed endlessly, was far from what my eyes are showing me now and what my heart is letting me feel.
Don’t get me wrong: I have no regrets. I totally believe that my own set of experiences have led me to genuinely advocate for inclusivity and diversity through the years which I believe, gradually, is initiating the much needed changes I longed to see when I started.
And we are very much deserving of it, regardless of our race, gender, status, accomplishment, religion or whatever standards that may divide us, knowingly or unknowingly.
Being different is a gift. It shouldn’t be taken against anyone who is just very much deserving to take up space as he/she is.
Standing out is not a crime. Fitting in is not a must. It’s all about respect.
There I said it.
Never let what makes you special weigh you down.
Own your space by fully embracing who and what you are, no ifs, or buts.
Be proud of what you chose to become amidst the ups and downs in life.
Those LGBTQIA+ kids made me realize that there was hope.
It was so heartwarming to witness each one of them being seen, heard, felt and celebrated.
I fervently hope such goes on long after the Pride summit is over.
To make that happen, we need each other, members of the LGBTQIA+ community or otherwise.
To inform. To Understand. To Accept.
So at this point in time, I want you to reflect on this:
What must you change within you so you can understand and accept others better?
What can you do to inspire others to do the same?
I look forward to seeing you do your part in creating a world where no one gets left behind.
Where someday, everyone can just be themselves, safely and free.
Time to live with pride.
Never hide.
– Rayban
One of the most memorable advertising campaigns I have ever worked on when I was still doing marketing and advertising for a living.
Who would have known years later, the said tagline will still ring true?
If you have been following me on social media or watching me go on-air for quite sometime now, you know how much I advocate for authenticity. I have always believed that it has always been one of my superpowers (alongside vulnerability, integrity and credibility) that allowed me to take up space in the coaching industry.
Part of being authentic is being able to love yourself whole and embrace yourself fully, flaws included. It’s all about recognizing who and what you are fully, and being comfortable with it.
It takes a whole lot of self-awareness, self-love and mental toughness and emotional mastery to be able to do that. Quite a lot of work, but definitely worth it.
Imagine: living a life that allows you to just let yourself be, without fear of judgments nor worries about being caught off guard. I know. Very happy and stress-free.
The freedom that goes with being able to embrace yourself as you are fully can do wonders to your overall wellness and wellbeing, as it allows you to navigate through life in your own terms, take up space as you are, at your own pace while continuously working on yourself and your growth.
Enjoying that freedom requires you though to come into terms with things, people, and situations that make you cringe and want to hide in the process. Consider those as your own deep, dark secrets that you hold on to just to look good or be worthy in the eyes of others.
Mind you though: that’s your ego talking. Using a megaphone to be precise. Haha!
Kidding aside, setting yourself free from the clutches of those seemingly uncomfortable details that surround your identity can help you journey towards your own #bestmeever .
I always liked this quote: ” If you were born poor, that’s not your fault. If you remain poor all through out your life, that’s your choice.” Can’t agree more. While you might not have the most amazing starting point, know that by taking pride on your humble beginnings, you get to inspire others to do the same and embark on that powerful journey to change their lives. Your past shouldn’t define you. How you take responsibility for it and use it as a tool to initiate the changes you want in your life, does.
2. Your failures and mistakes
In case you’ve forgotten: you are only human. So it’s ok to commit mistakes and fail. It means that you are trying. What is not ok is when you let those shortcomings overwhelm you and negate your perception towards yourself. Be proud of your battle scars and learn from them. Because for all you know, some day, your journey will be someone else’s survival guide. And that makes everything worth it.
3. Your present struggles
Struggling as of the moment does not make you less worthy, less respectable or less capable of having the life you’ve always wanted for yourself. Be brave enough to show your struggles and own them. Having things easy may be a good start for some; having to endure difficult times and allowing yourself to rise above them makes you beyond inspiring as you strive to do (and be ) better. It’ll all be worth it in the end.
4. Your achievements
If you worked hard for it, don’t be afraid to flaunt it. Never give in to the notion that when you post about your success, it’s already bragging. Because truth be told, it’s not. Say goodbye to success shaming. Remember, for as long as your intentions are clear and pure, you have every right to celebrate yourself and your win. How others see that is based on their own pains and projections; how you see it is based on your worth. And yes, you are very much deserving to acknowledge yourself and your wins.
5. Your Self
There you go. Bullseye! Haha! So when was the last time you felt really proud of yourself? Have you acknowledged how far you’ve gone and what you’ve become in the process? You don’t have to wait until you reach your biggest goals to be able to celebrate yourself and your growth. Know that as you are, you are amazing so give yourself more credit. You deserve to take centerstage, regardless of your race, gender, status, position, health, looks or whatever other aspects that make you feel less of a person. They don’t matter. You do.
I hope this blog post of mine allows you to toughen up and be brave enough to just let yourself be.
Time to live loud and proud, Unicorn.
Own your story.
