“Don’t be too happy. There might be something bad that’s about to happen soon.”
Have you ever heard this statement from your elders before?
I used to believe this before when I was younger but as I grew up and got to know myself on a deeper level, I began to question this.
Come to think of it: what’s wrong with being genuinely too happy to be living at present?
Like, is there really a limit to how happy a person should be?
And what’s with the curse thing? Why do we have to assume that there’s a mean trade off for just being in a space of joy?
Can you relate to all these?
Take this time to assess yourself: how happy are you allowing yourself to be?
What’s holding you back from being truly happy in your space?
Here’s the thing: most of the time, it’s guilt that’s making you feel uneasy and prevents you from truly being happy.
Guilt which can stem from a number of things:
Your responsibilities.
The opinion of other people.
Your assumptions.
Anxiety about the future.
And a whole lot more.
And believe me, guilt is something very heavy to carry. And takes up a lot of your head space and heart space too.
So how can you fully live and enjoy life given that?
The key here is to choose to let go of guilt so you can be genuinely happy with who you are and where you’re at.
It’s not about what you’ve been through, what you’re going through at present or whatever still awaits you that makes you deserving of true happiness. It’s how you choose to see yourself as you love yourself whole and embrace yourself fully. Never let anything or anyone else make you feel guilty for giving yourself the happiness you deserve to begin with. Happiness is your birth right, much like everyone else’s.
2. Take responsibility for yourself, your growth and your actions
Guilt comes in whenever you feel you’re neglecting yourself or others. Choosing to take responsibility for yourself and honoring your commitments will help you enjoy your current space more. It’s all about doing the best that you can with all that you have and being content with whatever your results may be there after, without fear or worries. You’ve done your part, and that will always be more than enough.
3. Let go of the things beyond your control
In life, sometimes we tend to beat ourselves up time and again for things we regret.Here’s the thing though: as you hold on to your regrets, what changes? Did your situation improve? Were you able to undo the past by hurting yourself? Or you just end up feeling stuck in a vicious cycle filled with guilt and a whole lot of what could have been? Maybe this is your sign to just let go. And by letting go does not mean you’re giving up. It only means you’re finally opening yourself to the possibility of moving forward as you focus on what you have control on: your genuine happiness now, wherever you may be at this point in time. Take this to heart: your past can hurt. But you can choose to heal and be happy at present.
4. Stop explaining yourself
No, you don’t need to justify your choices. No, you don’t need to explain yourself always. No, not everyone cares or will be willing to hear you out anyway. And guess what? All these are perfectly ok. You do you. You only feel guilty when you feel you fall short based on the standards of others. But honey, don’t even go that route. Focus on your own standards. They will never understand what your genuine happiness is to begin with. It’s a total experience that’s sacred to you, and yours alone. Keep it that way.
5. Share your happiness
Happiness is best enjoyed when shared with others. For as long as your intentions are clear, there’s nothing wrong with celebrating your wins or sharing your blessings to others, regardless of how the rest of the world might take them. Never compare your situation with that of others. Your journey is different to begin with. And it’s not your fault if others are not thriving as much as you are so don’t feel guilty. Instead, if you are in the position to inspire and help others, by all means, do so. Stop doubting yourself and making yourself feel unworthy of the happiness you are now experiencing. For all you know, you are the exact person someone out there needs to hear and experience to keep going in this lifetime. Don’t stop yourself from being a blessing to others just because of your assumptions and biases.
If there’s one thing I would like you to remember after reading this, it’s the fact that
Genuine happiness is free.
Take your share, whole-heartedly, without guilt.
You deserve it.
You’re happy.
Great.
That’s a very wonderful space to be in right now.
Maybe you’ve just healed from your past. Or achieved a new milestone. Or practicing new habits. that help you see the brighter side of things.
Whatever you’re doing, I am so glad it’s working for you.
I have always believed that genuine happiness should always be the main consideration when making life-changing decisions or pursuing one’s dreams and goals.
Being in that state of happiness actually works to one’s advantage.
So imagine, what if you can even be happier than you are now?
What if we can take that joy a notch higher? How different do you think you’re life would be?
Even more amazing I suppose.
I guess it’s all about adding that extra “oomph”… that “er” after the things that you’ve already been made familiar with in your journey.
If you know you can do more, do better. Don’t just settle for what’s easy. Treat the journey you have now as something that’s both empowering and exciting and allow yourself to grow in the process by humbly mastering all the challenges along the way. Give each one another try, this time with a little more effort, and see how that changes your results and how you feel about it initially.
2. Dream bigger
Nothing is impossible for a person who believes. Whatever your #bestmeever may look like, go for it. Aim higher. You’ve already made it this far. You can definitely go further, only if you allow your mind and heart to visualize bigger possibilities.
3. Become healthier
Take care of your over all wellness and well-being by only allowing people, things and situations that will contribute wonderfully to your health and happiness. Never take your health for granted and try at least doing one extra thing that will have your future self thank you at present.
4. Spend quality time with loved ones longer
Create new memories. Grow in harmony with people who make you feel so alive and make life worth living. When your heart overflows with gratitude and love, not only because of these people you choose to have in your space but also from within, you will be able to find more joy in even the most random things.
5. Be wiser.
Learn from your mistakes. Grow from them. Don’t let them define you. Instead, use them as stepping stones towards your own success. Remember, experience is the best teacher and regardless of whether it’s good or bad, it’s helping you acquire the knowledge and skills you need to push further in life. Just take them to heart.
You see, happiness is a matter of choice.
And by choosing to do (and be) all these things mentioned here, you allow yourself to be happier.
Time to take that happiness of yours to the next level.
Because you still can.
There will always be days which are less than perfect.
And that’s perfectly normal.
Once in a while, life throws you a curve ball, totally unexpected, leaving you struggling and confused as you try to control the situation on hand.
That’s part of human nature actually: wanting to be in control at all times, thinking that things should happen always the way we want them to.
But is that really the case?
Too much resistance at times can lead us to become frustrated when things don’t turn out to be in our favor, making us doubt ourselves.
We then begin to question our skills, our worthiness, and everything around us that causes our self-confidence to slide down dangerously.
When this happens, we end up feeling not good enough. And trust me, that isn’t exactly a nice space to be in.
You may ask: how can you feel good inside when everything else around you seems to be in total chaos and you’re against all odds?
That’s exactly the point: you are allowing the state of the things around you, become you. You are not what happens to you.
When situations seem unfavorable or people are treating you less than you deserve, when you focus on them, you amplify their impact on you.
What is key here is to recognize your need to become self-empowered so that you get to resolve that feeling of not being good enough.
1.) Remember that you have your own journey
Whenever you compare yourself with others or even your previous self (if you were doing good before), you rob yourself of the opportunity to grow in harmony with the now. You’re being unfair to yourself that way. Instead, what you can do is acknowledge your current progress. While it may not be perfect now, celebrate the fact that you’ve made it this far and most probably you’re still in time (and doing good) based on your own timelines and standards. Give yourself enough room to make mistakes and learn from them — that’s not exactly a bad thing, you know. Go and grow at your own pace, in your own space.
2.) Remember what you’re good at
Whatever that’s not working right now in your life, know that it’s only one aspect, not the whole so don’t ever let your results define you fully. Consider your journey and how far you’ve grown. Ask yourself this: what other things am I good at that can help me in my current space? Maybe it’s a matter of changing approach or simply changing your focus in the meantime until you feel fully inspired again. Creative? Think of news ways to approach it. A good writer? Write an inspiring story about your set back. A speaker? Talk about it. You can always make the most of what happens to you for a s long as you don’t let it define you.
3.) Consider it as a learning experience
Humbling, yet so empowering to know that there’s still room for growth. Embrace that beautiful lesson; it’s part of you as you become your own #bestmeever . Reflect on what you can improve on and who can help you in the process. Feeling not good enough is actually the push you need to step out of your comfort zone and commit to becoming your best. Don’t let any negative emotion pull you down.
4.) Take a time off to celebrate yourself
You don’t need to face everything all at once. Take a step back. Relax and ground yourself. It’s not the end of the world, my dear. You may not feel that you’re good enough in a particular space or for a particular person, but hey if you think long and hard about it, time and again, you have proven that otherwise. Try to write down the number of times you’ve succeeded in other matters. List down the number of people who have shown you love and inspiration. Note all the times you have felt proud of yourself. All those are beautiful justifications for you to move on and forward. Note to self: You’ve just encountered a hurdle. You’re not stuck in a rut. Because you’ve risen above that challenge before. Time and again.
5.) Make a difference in someone else’s life
You can always choose to lend a helping hand to those who have far less than you and have probably had things harder for them in general. Give yourself the same compassion you willingly give these people, You may feel small and insignificant now, but when you see the smiles on the faces of those you intentionally helped, that will change you. To feel different about yourself, allow yourself to make a difference in the lives of others. Because even in the smallest, simplest ways, like doing a favor or smiling or asking how they are — those can be life changing for them…and you as well. Because you matter too.
At this point, after having said all these, I just want you to remember this:
You will always be more than enough,
And that’s something good to hold on to, always.
