You can’t have it all.
Otherwise, you’ll be perfect. And that’s not possible.

Because nobody is.

And yes, that’s pretty much ok.

Hey, don’t get me wrong: you can always aspire for more.

No one is stopping you from dreaming bigger or achieving more.

You deserve that.

What I am trying to say is that it’s ok if you don’t get exactly what you want.

May it be winning in a competition.

The promotion you worked hard for.

The trip that got cancelled.

The person you were pursuing.

The relationship that you lost.

And whatever else that may have cause you pain and suffering.

Take this time to assess: what is it that’s burdening you as of the moment? How are you dealing with it?

Whatever it may be, no matter how heavy it may seem, please do me a favor: promise me you’ll be kinder to yourself.

Promise me that you will stop blaming yourself for what happened.

That you will stop thinking of yourself negatively.

That you won’t give up on yourself.

Do it not only for me, but for youself because you are worthy of second chances amidst all the craziness surrounding you.

A second, third, fourth or no matter how many it takes.

Your imperfections don’t make you insignificant.

It does not make you less of a person.

It makes you human.

And they humble you in the process of maximizing what you have so you can become what you’re meant to be.

It’s all about learning from your imperfections and the things that have gone wrong while working around them using the lessons you now have.

Never attach your happiness to things, people or situations that you feel will make your life perfect.

Your happiness is here and now. Within you, and whom you choose to be.

It does not come when things are perfect.

It comes when you are ready to embrace your reality and take up space as you are, no matter how imperfect the situation may seem.

Look around you. What do you need to be more mindful about? What can you appreciate more?

Look within you. What needs to change? How can you make that happen?

You are a work in progress. So are we. And that’s ok.

You may not have it all. And that’s fine.

Because all it takes is genuine appreciation for what you have and who you’re becoming as you journey towards your own #bestmeever .

Keep going. Keep growing.
In your own special, imperfect way.

Being brave can take you further in life.
So true, don’t you think?

Think about this: how many times have your fears stopped you from becoming your own #bestmeever ?

Hey, don’t start beating yourself up now because that isn’t exactly the solution to overcome whatever hurdles you may have now.

Remember: loving yourself is actually your own responsibility. So never forget to give yourself what is due: kindness, understanding and the chance to maximize all the opportunities given to you by being brave enough to go for them while feeling worthy all through out.

I know: easier said than done. Most especially if you feel that the world has collapsed underneath you and everything around you just looks and feels uncertain. Not exactly ideal for anyone, if I may say.

However, if you’re truly committed to yourself, your happiness and your growth, know that you can summon that inner courage you thought you never had. Yup, it has always been there; you just have to inquire within and let your inspiration draw it out as you re-write your own story once more.

So coming from a space of self-love and worthiness, here are the 5 things you should not be afraid of:

  1. Change

Here’s the thing: change is inevitable and very much beautiful. You just have to trust yourself and the process more to be able to really see the purpose behind each one unfold. Resisting change actually makes you feel stuck and blurs your own vision of growth and happiness. Think about this: what if the seemingly uncomfortable changes you’re undergoing now is actually preparing you for greater things ahead? Patience my dear; everything will eventually fall into place.

2. Failures

Nobody’s perfect. So why even pressure yourself too much to be just that? Let yourself be. Do what you can with all that you have and with the clearest intentions on hand. That will always be more than enough. Even if things don’t go as planned and you find yourself at the “losing” end, know that it’s not the end of the world. It’s actually just the beginning for you as you take new lessons to heart and use them accordingly moving forward. Yes, failures can be blessings in disguise too.

3. Growing old

Growing old is a privilege. Not everyone gets to celebrate his/her birthday until his/her hair turns gray. Embrace it. Stop equating it with loss of beauty, significance, health or mobility. Instead, see old age as a sign of growth and wisdom, an inspiration for all those who have yet to embark on the journey you have accomplished. The key here is to ensure that you make the most of each and every moment so that when you look back someday, you won’t have any regrets.

4. Starting all over again

Back to zero. This is what a lot of people dread, most especially during old age where they feel they have so much to lose. Not true though. With nothing else to lose, there’s so much more to gain as you commit to working your way up. To be free to do and be what you want in this lifetime is a priceless experience so never let tenure or the fear of letting go of what you have prevent you from pursuing what you truly want and deserve. It will always be worth it.

5. Embracing your authentic self

As you are, you are very much worthy and deserving to take up space. Never let anything or anyone make you feel otherwise. By being brave enough to show your authentic self to the rest of the world, you inspire others to set themselves free too from their own fear of rejection and judgment. Be the inspiration you were called to be in this lifetime.

I hope you get to reflect accordingly about these so that you can finally tap into that courage within as you live the life you truly want and deserve.

Believe in yourself. You can do it.

I always say this to people who are forcing themselves in certain situations:
Don’t come from obligation. Come from inspiration.

Makes sense right?

I mean who wants to be merely forced to do things just because it’s their duty or that responsibility was bestowed upon them?

Whether it’s about being the eldest in the family to take care of all your siblings or the youngest who is expected to just listen and follow,

To being the breadwinner in the family,

to having a senior (or most junior) position at work where expectations and deliverables vary

among others.

Can you relate?

I guess the bigger question is: how much do you really like what you’re expected to do every single day based on the role you portray?

Let’s be honest. It can be quite hard at times.

Simply because as you try to live up to the expectations of others, you oftentimes put yourself and your needs last simply because you feel that you shouldn’t be a priority because work (or your role) calls.

Imagine the stress, the shame, and other negative emotions that are brought about by the pressure to conform and just deliver.

However, truth be told, forcing yourself won’t do you (or the relationship at stake) any good.

You’ll only end up hating yourself and the space you’re in, in the long run.

So the key here is to come from inspiration, as you fill in each responsibility or duty with new meaning to keep you going.

Here are 5 ways to turn your obligations into inspiration:

  1. See your responsibilities as opportunities for growth

As you challenge yourself by handling multiple tasks all at the same time, you allow yourself to learn and grow in the process. No matter how uncomfortable the situation may seem at first, by embracing it fully minus any form of resistance, you get to make the most of the journey as you become the person you’re meant to be: your own #bestmeever .

2. Take note of the lives you can change

You are perhaps the ray of hope everyone else around you needed at that time. Be that enabler of change. Know that the seeds you plant today may bring about that much needed growth and change you dreamed not only for others, but for yourself as well. It just had to start with you loving what you do.

3. You allow your relationships to bloom

Never underestimate your impact in the lives of others. By willingly helping out, you help build trust and establish stronger bonds with the people around you. This makes the journey easier when you allow them to support you as well to ensure that everyone is on the same page, with the same goal in mind so you never feel alone as you take the lead.

4. You get to recognize your own value

It could have been anyone else, but it was handed on to you. There’s a reason for everything and God does not give you any challenge that you can’t overcome. It’s been given to you because it’s meant to teach you beautiful lessons you need moving forward. You are the chosen one. You are good enough, worthy enough. Know that someday you will look back and realize why everything had to happen that way. Simply because, they were preparing you to become the person you’re meant to be.

5. You don’t end up having regrets

When you don’t like what you’re doing, you tend to complain left and right, oftentimes missing out on the important moments, milestones and lessons along the way. By loving what you do and being inspired by your own responsibilities, you get to maximize the space you’re in and look beyond desired results as you just focus on enjoying the journey while living fully. Don’t let your obligations stop you from making the most of this lifetime.

I hope after reading this, you have unburdened yourself from the responsibilities you may be carrying.
Use them as a springboard instead that will bring you closer to what you’re meant to be:
an amazing inspiration to everyone else around you.

Life doesn’t have to be perfect for it to be beautiful and worth sharing.
I hope this hits home hard.

Seriously. Having a highly curated life on social media does not exactly equate to enjoying life as is, in general.

But come to think of it: why do people tend to hide the other (note my conscious decision to use that neutral word) of life?

What is it about the less than perfect moments that make us want to hide them?

What misconceptions do you have about your own?

Take this time to reflect:

Which part of your life are you hiding from the rest of the world due to shame?

A failure?

Unguarded moments caught on cam?

Criticisms from others?

Your next chapter?

What makes you want to bury them into oblivion?

I know that you may have your own reasons for keeping them invisible to the prying eyes of everyone around you but hey, I just want you to know this:

It’s ok to share those less than perfect, less than happy moments with the rest of the world.

It doesn’t make you less of a person each time you talk about what others may be dreading to discuss.

In fact, by doing so, you become a beacon of hope and strength for all those who need to overcome their own shame.

On that note, allow me to share with you the 5 things you should not be ashamed about:

  1. Your past

How many times have you heard me say: “Your past should not define you.”? There, I said it again. But hey it’s true. Think about this: you can’t exactly turn back time more so undo what has been done. You can only focus on learning from the experience. That means, whatever you’ve been through before, no matter how tough life was, it’s ok. Show off your battle scars. They are beautiful reminders that you’ve made it this far in this life time, a privilege which not everyone gets to enjoy because they let their past hold them back.

2. Your present

Where you are right now at this point in your life is only temporary. So why be ashamed of it? It’s merely a pitstop; just a tiny spec in your life’s journey ahead. Wouldn’t it be inspiring for others to see how you decided to work on yourself at present to eventually become the person you’re meant to be: your own #bestmeever ? Know that your life at present does not have to be free from flaws to be meaningful and rewarding. What is important to remember here is that you were brave enough to start and committed enough to continue on with your journey.

3. Your relationships

Never hide the people you truly matter to you. Whether it’s a family member, a dear friend or a special someone, be proud of the relationship you have. That shows how much value you put in the relationship by acknowledging it fully. Ok, you don’t have to go overboard about posting sweet pics or writing mushy stuff every now and then; what I am saying is that never deny people in your life, regardless of how others may respond to your admittance. It’s ok though. You are not here to please anyone nor allow anyone to dictate whom you could share spaces with.

4. Your struggles

It’s normal to have ups and downs in life. Take that to heart please. Never be ashamed of your struggles. It’s ok to be vulnerable and admit that you need help. It actually shows how strong you are and how mindfully aware you are of your own needs and wants. At the end of the day, too much pride won’t help resolve your challenges on hand so best if you acknowledge your own difficulties and allow yourself to receive the support you need as you inspire others to be comfortable enough to ask for help too. No man is an island and nobody’s perfect so just stay true and give yourself what is due.

5. Your goals and dreams

No matter how big they may be, you are very much worthy of your own goals and dreams. If you truly want to manifest them to reality, speak with pride about them and feel as if they already came true. Don’t ever minimize them or shrink yourself just to fit in or to avoid being judged by others. It will never be worth each time you shortchange yourself. You have what it takes to succeed and no matter how ambitious you may seem, you have nothing to explain to others who aren’t even part of your dreams.

As you are, you are worthy to take up space, express yourself and live life fully and free.

Never let shame make you feel otherwise.

Time to live brave and proud.

Do you believe in serendipity?
I do.
And you seeing this is no accident.

I have always believed that everything happens for a reason.

Good or bad, each particular event in our lives is meant to shape us moving forward through key realizations and timely lessons.

And for some reasons, as rain pours down heavily outside of my window, I felt compelled to write this blog.

Is it a channeled message? Don’t know.

Is it something which perhaps may be timely and relevant for you? Perhaps.

To dig deeper on that note, take a few minutes to assess your current space.

How’s your journey towards your own #bestmeever ?

Are there patterns in your life you need to recognize?

What is the key message of everything happening around you (and within you)?

Ok, don’t overanalyze. The key here is to embrace things as they are and allow yourself to really feel and understand what you need as of the moment.

To help you a bit, feel free to check on these 5 things that you need to know now. Who knows, they may exactly be the one you need for today to help you process everything:

1. Where you are now is just the starting point of your journey.

Don’t fret. While your present is teaching you all the lessons you need to thrive moving forward, it may not be exactly embody your final destination. Applies to when you’re having the time of your life or when it seems that you’ve hit your lowest point. Use whatever it is that your current space is teaching you so that you start strong as you embark on that life changing journey towards what you truly want and deserve in this life time. Remember: it’s not about where or who you are at present, but rather, what you choose to become (and do) about it. Yes, the exciting part is yet to happen.

2. You’ve been through worse and survived.

Sometimes we find ourselves in a number of less than pleasant situations that make us forget our very own worth and progress. Never let challenging times overwhelm you and invalidate your growth. Remember how far you’ve gone and honor yourself. I am sure that if you draw inspiration from your past experiences experiences you never thought you would survive but did, you can definitely ace the one you are facing now.

3. You have a choice.

You are not stuck. You are not helpless. Your life isn’t over. While there may be things beyond your control, you always have the choice to see them differently and allow yourself to focus on what you can still do. And whatever you choose for as long as you take responsibility, no matter how others may react towards your choices, know that you are not obliged to explain yourself and justify each one. So choose to stop stressing yourself because for as long as you’re alive, you can change the space you’re in by choice.

4. It’s time.

I don’t know but I felt like writing this. How does this resonate with you? Maybe it’s time to change careers? Pursue a passion you’ve parked? Invest on yourself? Say sorry? Fall in love? Go back home? I think now will always be the perfect time to do whatever it is that is in your heart because no one can really predict what the future holds for everyone of us. As what the famous quote of R’Bonney Gabriel said in her winning answer in Miss Universe then: if not now, then when? Makes a lot of sense to me. And hopefully, to you too.

5. You matter.

You have a beautiful role to play in this life time. Know that in your own little way, someone out there is inspired to push forward because you showed him/her that it’s possible. As you are also, regardless of what you’ve been through or whatever you’re going through as of the moment, know that you are supported and loved and that you are not alone in your journey. Remember: even total strangers have compassionate hearts. So allow yourself to take up space because that is what you deserve.

I know that as random as these thoughts may seem, I hope at least one resonated with you.

Because you reading this is a serendipitous moment leading you towards your own #bestmeever .
Enjoy the journey.

It’s unfortunate at times that we lose people along the way as we journey through life.
Whether we like it or not, certain circumstances prevent us from keeping everyone onboard all through out.

Yep, not everyone can be part of your #bestmeever journey till the end.

And that’s perfectly ok. Know that no matter how short a person’s role in your life may be, he/she has taught you the lessons you needed to know at that point in time.

However, included in the lessons you have to learn as you go through life is the willingness to fight for relationships worth saving.

Now, I want you to take this time and reflect: is there any relationship you wish to save, one that may have been affected before when life was tougher than usual?

A former flame with an unfinished business?

A family member you have strained your ties with?

An old friend you have hurt unintentionally?

And the list goes on.

Well, here’s the thing: sometimes we do things (and say things as well) which we don’t mean just because we are caught in the moment.

However, let it be known that it’s not exactly a free pass so to speak.

While we cannot undo the past, it is important to know that we still have the present moment to work with and allow ourselves to start all over again as we try to win back the people closest to our hearts.

Yup, it’s not yet the ending if it isn’t a happy one. Preach. Haha!

So yeah, you can still win them over. Or at least try.

Remember: if a relationship of whatever kind is worth saving. Go for it. You have nothing else to lose. You only have this lifetime to be happy so might as well do what you must for at the end of the day, at least you tried.

Now, if you find yourself wanting to save a relationship you have on hand, and you are 100% committed in doing so, check on these 5 ways you can win people back:

1. Apologize personally

    Nope. Not text. Not call. Not email. Not snail mail. Not through a friend or family member. Apologize face to face to the person you have severed ties with and show how genuinely you mean it. You don’t need to put on a show or make it grand; you just have to speak from the heart and really mean what you say. Don’t hide behind the digital space or any other person; be accountable for yourself and your actions and own the apology you are expressing.

    2. Respect people’s reactions

    While your intentions may be good, you can’t really expect everyone to take it the way you want them to. We all have different responses towards pain and it’s important to respect that and realize that this time around, the ball isn’t exactly on your court. You can’t (and should not) force things, relationships included. What is important here is you expressed your genuine apology and you allow yourself to listen to what the hurting party has to say and just let things be there after, coming from a space of humility and understanding.

    3. Initiate the necessary changes

    If you want to show your sincerity, don’t wait for the other person to tell you what needs to be done. What is key here is to reflect on what you fought about initially and what could be done differently moving forward. To win back another person, you must be willing to adjust accordingly based on your agreements or if none yet, based on what you think will be best for the relationship while taking into consideration what the other party is complaining about initially. Being pro-active can earn you extra brownie points along the way so whether or not you win the other person back, at least you have shown how much you value the relationship by embracing the changes needed.

    4. Seek help from common friends/family you both trust

    Bridging the gap. Pun intended haha! Kidding aside, people will respond more positively towards people they trust so if you have common friends or family members they adore fully, seek their help. Show them how much you mean your apology and ask them to help you win back the other person. Ask for tips they may have and work up a plan with them. Be humble enough to listen and accept their initial reaction though, most specially if they become over protective about the other person at first, which is quite normal. Know that eventually knowing that someone else has your back can relieve you of the unnecessary anxiety the waiting game can bring.

    5. Be grateful for the impact of the other person on your own growth

    I am beyond sure that once you implement the necessary improvements on your life in response to the need to make up for what you’ve done before that left people hurting, others will take notice. Never forget to be vocal and honest about thanking the other party because at the end of the day, whatever beautiful changes you have now in your space is because of the experience you initially had. This also allows the other person feel valued as he/she becomes instrumental to your own growth, and that of your relationship. Appreciation, of whatever form, can go a long way, most especially when it comes to saving relationships and winning people back.

    I hope reading this inspires you to take action and win back the relationships you desire.

    At the end of the day, nothing is impossible if you’re committed to making things right .
    You can win this.

    Never say die.
    How many times have you heard this in your life time?

    Whether someone told you this or you have made this your own mantra, it still serves the same purpose:

    To remind you to never give up.

    I know, easier said than done.

    I mean admittedly, life isn’t exactly perfect at all times. Well, it doesn’t have to be really, for it to be beautiful and meaningful, but this is a totally new context all together.

    What I am basically saying is that sometimes life has its own twists and turns and sometimes we find ourselves in situations that are far from ideal, oftentimes very difficult to handle.

    And when things go wrong, as they sometimes will, we find ourselves wanting to just throw in the towel, run away and hope and pray by doing so closes that unwanted chapter.

    Can relate?

    Take this time to think: when was the last time you almost gave up on something? On someone?

    What was the compelling reason then?

    What was the impact of your decision?

    I know that while some of you may think that it was the best decision made during that time, others may not exactly share that sentiment most specially after the dust has settled.

    Because in reality, at times, giving up isn’t exactly the best solution.

    Here are the 5 times you should not give up:

    1. When things are hard

      Fact: you can only grow and become your own #bestmeever outside of your comfort zone. Which means when situations seem to be getting tougher and tougher and you feel overwhelmed, the key here is to pause and ground yourself, not run away at the first sight of the problem. Know that things may be hard at the beginning but if you totally commit to overcoming the challenges on hand, they become easier as you learn and grow in the process. Stop resisting and start embracing things as they are because they ae teaching you the valuable lessons you need moving forward. As they say, no pain, no gain.

      2. When you truly want something

      As Simon Sinek said: “Remember your Why.” You’ve made it this far. Why let everything go to waste by giving up now? Your goals and dreams deserve your 100% commitment so keep going. Remind yourself how much each one means to you and what is the value of achieving your goals and dreams eventually. Make your reasons larger than life so that they don’t get dwarfed by challenges along the way.

      3. When it takes a lot of time

      Not everything has to happen all at once. Greatness takes time. So should you. Don’t ever hurry growth as you may end up with half-baked results. Know that delays can also be blessings as they serve as your springboard towards improving yourself along the way as you discover the silverlining in each. Be more patient with yourself and your growth. You will fully bloom when it’s time. Until then, enjoy the journey.

      4. When others are not supporting you

      I’ve said it time and again before and I’ll say it again: you don’t need anyone’s go signal for you to finally give yourself what you truly want and deserve as you pursue your biggest dreams. Don’t let the lack of support from others stop you from what you’re called to do (and be). Be your own biggest cheerleader. Know that once you decide and commit to pushing through, you will eventually meet the right people who deserve to share spaces with you in this new journey of yours and who will support you unconditionally. Let others watch and see, because more often than not, they are secretly hoping that they were brave enough to at least try the way you did in their space. Yep, you are most probably triggering their insecurities.

      5. When you have failed before

      Your past doesn’t define you. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve failed before for as long as you keep going and keep improving each time you try again. Do things differently. Seek a new mentor. Learn from your mistakes. Do what you think is best so that this time around you don’t let your past failures haunt you and distract you from your goals. Know that those failures of yours will eventually be someone’s inspiration to try harder in their space and your entire journey will be someone else’s guide to ultimately surviving in this life time. Be the inspiration they (and you, yourself) need.

      At the end of the day, remember this:

      You will always be worth another chance, another try.
      So please, don’t ever give up.

      It takes two to tango. It has to be give and take. Always.
      Heard those time and again when it comes to relationships.

      And I truly agree.

      I mean I have always been an advocate of healthy relationships that are grounded on love, trust and respect.

      Those are vital ingredients that help every person involved in a relationship grow in harmony with each other and as individuals as well.

      I also believe that we should always be intentional in the relationships we keep.

      On that note, I want you to take this time to reflect first on the relationships you keep.

      What is the value of that relationship?

      How is it helping you grow into the person that you’re meant to be?

      Are you inspired by it genuinely?

      These are some of the questions we tend to overlook because we take for granted the relationships we have.

      Or the other way around actually.

      Either way, that won’t do any good in the long run.

      No one wants to be in a one-sided relationship.

      After all, we all deserve to be loved, seen, heard, felt and celebrated by the people we choose to share spaces with.

      Now, I totally feel that some of you may be triggered already because you feel that you’re not exactly getting what is due from the relationships you keep.

      Know that with that awareness about where you stand in your relationship, you are now beginning to acknowledge your value as a person and you can initiate the changes you want moving forward as you journey towards your own #bestmeever .

      Allow me to share with you the 5 ways how you can not be taken for granted by the relationships you choose to have:

      1. Communicate needs and expectations

      A lot of relationships falter because the lines of communication are not open. At the beginning of every relationship (and even as it progresses), always remember to have that benchmarking conversation about where you are at present and where you want to go eventually. Indicate your needs and wants and try to come up with a compromise so that (all) parties will be fully aware of their responsibilities. This presents something to look back to when things seem to be somewhat unfair or agreements have been overlooked. At the end of the day, you cannot resolve what you don’t know so it’s very important to lay down all your cards accordingly.

      2. Speak up as it happens

      Never keep your feelings to yourself. Its much healthier if you voice them out coming from a space of self-worth and respect. Don’t hold back because tolerating the actions of the other party might come out as something that’s acceptable for them. Remember, the end goal is to make the relationship work by addressing concerns accordingly without formulating false narratives based on mere assumptions as you hold on to them. It’s not about how the other party will react; it’s about you acknowledging the feeling of being taken for granted, whether intentionally or otherwise.

      3. Set and maintain boundaries

      Some people will always try to assert themselves just to get what they want. Hold your ground. Emphasize that a NO is a NO. Not a conditional one. Not something that can be set aside. Establish your own rules which you feel will be beneficial for your own wellness and wellbeing. And that’s totally ok. You are still entitled to your own space even with the numerous relationships you keep. Never lose yourself in the process of just wanting to keep them.

      4. Do self check-ins

      You are just as important as the people you’re in a relationship with, whether it’s a family member, a friend, workmate or significant other. It’s best if you always take time to inquire within and ask yourself how you’re really feeling as of the moment, based on how others are treating you. Are you genuinely happy in the relationship? Do you feel valued? Or is there something missing that you must acknowledge and address accordingly? Don’t be afraid to face the truth because that’s the only way you can work on yourself and your relationships.

      5. Assess the growth of your relationship then act on it

      Reverting back to value, assess how far you’ve grown as individuals and how much your relationship has improved through time. Determine the roles and contributions of all the people involved in the relationship and do a check and balance if everyone is giving what is due accordingly to the welfare of the relationship. If you feel that you’re not growing in your relationship or if it’s only the other party that’s benefitting, assess what’s holding you back and what needs to change accordingly in the relationship for you to be able to maximize your own potential and achieve your own growth. On the other hand, evaluate how your relationship has changed for the better through the years. Are you guys still on track based on your goals set initially? What is the current state of the relationship? Communicate all these to the people involved so that you can address all accordingly moving forward. In the end, if it’s no longer working for you, do what you think will be best, coming from a space of giving yourself what you truly want and deserve, because yes, you have that choice.

      Always remember that you, much like everyone else, deserves to be treated and valued the way you want to.
      Never let anyone make you feel otherwise.
      If they do take you for granted, feel free to grant them what they deserve:
      your absence.
      Because life is too short to stay in a one-sided relationship to begin with.

      Not yet.
      One of the most disheartening phrases to hear when you have a lot of expectations.
      On yourself and on others.

      Can you relate?

      Oftentimes we associate the word “yet” with delays and detours. And everything else that is not fully in alignment with our plans.

      That leads us to think that anything with the word “yet” in it means something bad or disappointing.

      Think about it: when was the last time you used the word “yet” and how did you respond to it?

      When asked about getting your big break?

      When asked about being able to finally pursue your passion?

      If you finally found the one after dating so many people?

      Have you eaten yet?

      And yes, I could go on and on asking you questions that you may have found yourself answering with a phrase or sentence that includes the word “yet.”

      Now if you just caught yourself answering from a negative space as you see “yet” in a bad light, then this is your sign to inquire within and hopefully realize that it (the use of yet, I mean) is not really all that bad.

      In fact, it can actually be just as empowering as the word “yes”, when used (and viewed) differently.

      Here are some of the ways you can use it differently:

      1. See it as a springboard to something great rather than as an end by itself just by adding a statement on a positive note.

      Example:

      Question: Have you achieved your goals for this year?

      Answer (seeing it as an end by itself): Not yet. It’s quite hard.

      Suggested reframing: Not yet but I truly feel I can make that happen anytime soon as I have new opportunities in the pipeline.

      2. Come from a space of curiosity as you explore possibilities.

      Example:

      Question: Have you checked on the latest trends online about coaching?

      Answer (coming from a disinterested space, seeing it as an add on task): Not yet. Busy.

      Suggested reframing: I have yet to check on them but please do tell me what they’re about as I think they can be of value.

      3. Use it as an empowering qualifier instead

      Question: Have you addressed your problem completely?

      Answer (triggered): Not yet.

      Suggested reframing: Having quite a hard time now yet I am learning a lot and I am very much committed to pushing forward, one step at a time.

      I hope these reframes help you see the word “yet” through a positive lens moving forward. Allows you to stress less and focus more on improving yourself and what you can still do at the moment.

      Remember, delays and detours will always be part of your own #bestmeever journey. so don’t fret.
      The best is YET to come.
      And that’s something amazing to look forward to.

      Good or bad, each and every experience teaches you the lessons you need in life.
      One of my favorite things to say during interviews and talks.

      Because it just rings so true, in so many ways.

      I know though for a fact that it’s easier to absorb and learn lessons through good times, but the bigger question is: how do you respond when things don’t go as planned?

      Be honest with yourself now: what do you do exactly when faced with uncertainty and seemingly unfavorable situations?

      Do you become angry?

      Do you resist them strongly?

      Do you panic and breakdown?

      Or do you blame others for your situation?

      These are just some of the common reactions of people who are caught off guard and swept away by their heightened emotions.

      However, the key here is to let the emotions settle down first to reveal the true life lessons underneath the challenging times encountered.

      Seemingly difficult at first but very much possible by giving yourself enough time and space to just breathe and let yourself be.

      Remember: unless it’s a matter of life and death, not everything has to happen all at once so stop overthinking and stop over reacting.

      There I said it.

      So now you can focus on what really matters most: the value of challenging experiences in your life as you see each one of them in a different light.

      Sharing with you the 5 life lessons hard times are teaching you:

      1. Everything is temporary.

      Nothing is permanent in this world, including tough times. Whatever it is you’re going through right now, no matter how hard, it will eventually come to pass. Think about this: would the thing or situation stressing you now still matter in a year’s time? I am so sure not as much, or not at all. It’s not the end of your journey; it’s just part of your story. And you’ll be ok eventually.

      2. Surrendering does not mean you’re losing.

      You can’t control everything. And you shouldn’t even try to. There is beauty in letting go and letting things be. For as long as you’ve given your best, with all that you have and all that you are, that’s more than enough. As you trust yourself and the process more, you actually win in life because you allow yourself to be taken to where (and become what) you’re meant to be. And yes, your #bestmeever journey won’t always be easy…but it will definitely be worth it.

      3. Real relationships reveal themselves during hard times.

      I think one of the biggest blessings in disguise that tough times carry is that it makes you realize who is really there for you and who is meant to stay in your life when all of this is over. Painful realization yes, especially if the people you were counting on turn their back on you. However, at least it gives you a clear picture of where you stand in their life. You can do away with people who didn’t even bother asking you how you were, people who didn’t listen to your side of your story and people who simply vanished into thin air. They are not your people, So make sure you don’t invite them in your space when things go well eventually, even if they invite themselves in again. Quality over quantity and I am beyond confident that your life can go on without them. Because based on what they’ve shown, they were never with you in this journey to begin with.

      4. You get to know yourself better when times are hard.

      You are stronger than you think you are and more resourceful and capable than you ever imagined. With nothing else to lose as you hit the lowest point in your life, you begin to explore possibilities bravely and that can lead you to your next breakthrough. It’s all about tapping into your inner greatness, because truth be told, you have everything within to help you get through and succeed in this lifetime.

      5. You can change for the better when you’re not bitter.

      Never to late to embrace change. Allow yourself to stop resisting it as you let time and space take the lead. Everything will fall into place once you have cleared your mind and heart from the things you need to let go of, as you welcome what needs to take up space so you can start all over again on a better, happier note. As they say, growth can start off messy at first. And that’s ok.

      Hopefully this blog post makes it easier for you to embrace hard times this time around.

      Always remember that you are exactly where you’re meant to be right now:
      to learn the important life lessons to allow you to live life happily and fully.

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