Love is in the air once more.
Can you feel it?
Well, that should always be the case on an everyday basis but it’s February so yeah, it becomes extra special with Valentines Day just around the corner.
The signs are all there: hearts all over. Love songs. Serenades. Couple promos. Love notes. Balloons. And a bunch of all possible kinds of bouquets to suit every budget. Haha!
But kidding aside, Valentines Day, more so love, isn’t exactly just that.
To be honest, those are just social constructs. Because in reality, Valentines Day, and love per se, can also be expressed in different ways apart from what is considered the norm.
Now I want you to reflect: how do you define love? How do you express it?
Whatever your definition may be, think about it: where does this stem from? What impact does it have on me?
You see, you may have some misconceptions about love that actually prevent you from fully appreciating it, at its core.
Hear me out on this: while there is so much beauty in being selfless, know that you are also very much worthy to receive the kind of love you willingly give to others. Never think of yourself as a mere provider. You are not here to just be everyone’s savior…you also need to welcome the love others are willing to give to you and the one coming from yourself too.
2. Tolerance is not a form of love
Anything that you tolerate does not grow. Yup, take that to heart. Relationships included. Never tolerate any form of toxic behavior just because you love the person. You are actually preventing the person from realizing his/her flaws by allowing him/her to continue with the undesirable behaviors. Love knows the value of speaking up, coming from a space of honesty — to say what the other person deserves to hear and what you truly mean from within to be able to come up with a compromise that will work best for the relationship at stake.
3. Jealousy is not a sign of love
Trust is very important in a relationship. While a little jealousy is normal, when it becomes too often and the reaction triggered by it becomes worse, please take note that does not equate at all to the intensity of one’s love for another. Jealousy, truth be told, is actually a sign of insecurity and possessiveness. What is key here now is to address it accordingly at its bud stage so that it doesn’t grow any bigger than it should. Always establish the value of trust and honesty within the relationship to ensure that the green eyed monster does not show up.
4. Love is enough to make a relationship work
While love conquers all, love alone cannot make a relationship grow. Open communication. Consistency. Commitment. Compassion. Understanding. Effort. Some of the other things a relationship needs in order for it to flourish fully amidst challenging times. Make sure to include them all accordingly.
5. Love is all about the intensity of the passion
As time goes by, love evolves accordingly. After the honeymoon stage, sometimes the intensity of the intimacy lessens but does not mean that love, does too. What is important to take note of here is that true love endures the test of time, long after the strength of the initial passion is gone. It’s all about making meaningful moments beyond the physicality of things and focusing on nurturing the feelings and allowing them to blossom in their current space without feeling incomplete or inadequate just because the passion has lessened. Hear me on this: as you grow older, the goal should not be bringing back the passion and intimacy, but rather, remembering the kind of love you had when you started and anchoring on that feeling as you grow it once more.
As we celebrate Valentines Day this year, I hope you get to see love in a different light.
Because love was never one dimensional.
Happy hearts month, everyone.
So today was one of those days that I felt I had to write down my thoughts.
As random as they may seem, I just felt that someone had to read them.
And who knows, may it’s you! Haha!
I sincerely believe that there are no coincidences and that writing this post in time for the holidays is nothing short of divine intervention.
Like seriously: I was driving home on my way from getting last minute presents for the security staff and receptionist in my condo when I thought about writing something centered on hope.
I think that’s one thing we all need now as we go through the holidays with our own set of experiences.
I think it’s quite safe to say that the year wasn’t exactly perfect (as none is, really), and that presents reason enough to focus on the fact that silver linings and second chances are just around the corner too.
So take this as my gift for all of you guys who have been with me since God knows when and perhaps now, need a huge dose of hope for whatever reason you may have.
Without further ado, here are my prayers for everyone. Feel free to take what resonates and share what you feel can help someone else who might need some inspiration and support to move forward:
I hope that if you’re struggling right now, may you find a number of reasons to keep going, no matter what happens, simply because that is what you deserve: to give yourself that fighting chance to win battles the rest of us may not know about.
I hope that if you’re hurting now because you felt hurt or betrayed as other people left your side unexpectedly, know that everything happens for a reason and not everyone deserves to share spaces with you in your next chapter. It might be, as weird as it seems now, a form of protection for yourself as you let go of people who don’t recognize your true value. It’s definitely their loss.
I hope that if you’re feeling defeated now because things aren’t going as planned in your career and you feel that you’re a failure, please don’t. You are not defined by your profession or accomplishments so stop beating yourself up. You have what it takes to succeed in this lifetime and I hope you take that to heart especially during days that are harder than most. To win, inquire within.
I hope that if you’re grieving over a lost love or someone dear to you that has passed on, may you find comfort that someday you’ll heal and share spaces once more. In the meantime, be grateful that once in your life, your paths crossed and they have already fulfilled their purpose. Now, it’s your time to make yourself (and them) proud.
I hope if you feel stuck because of the numerous delays and countless detours you are experiencing at the moment, may you realize that the Universe is just giving you enough time and space to think things over and recalibrate accordingly so that you will eventually be in alignment with what you’re truly meant to be. Trust in the magic of divine timing.
I hope that if you’re feeling overwhelmed now by the hustle and bustle of the holidays, please know that it’s ok to pause, have a break and let yourself be. You won’t be judged for protecting your sanity and space. Do what’s best for you please.
I hope if you’re feeling angry and frustrated, know that everything is only temporary and it will come to pass. Please don’t make impulsive decisions that will bear consequences long after your heightened emotions have faded. Take deep breaths and focus on what can still go right even if it seems harder than usual.
I hope if you’re still hiding for whatever reason, may you find the courage and commitment to show up and take up space. You deserve to be heard, seen, felt and celebrated as you are so please gift the world with your presence.
I hope if you still have your loved ones with you, please spend quality time with them. Never be too busy to show them you care because you may not have the same moment in the future. Cherish today and make as many beautiful memories as you can because that’s the best gift you can give yourself and others: time.
I hope if you’re in your season of harvest, may you remain grateful and remember the value of sharing and keeping to heart the times life humbled you before. Balance is key so that your blessings continue to pour from a space of overflow.
I hope that through it all, whatever you’ve been through, whatever you’re going through at the moment and whatever still awaits you, may you find more than enough reason to honor yourself and your progress, no matter how big or small, simply because you’re still on your way to becoming your own #bestmeever .
I hope that whatever it is in your heart that I may have missed praying for in this post, may God find ways to make them come true, in His time. And know that it will always be perfect.
So there you go. May all these prayers of hope come true for all of you guys.
And me too!
At the end of the day, I just want everyone of us to have a merry Christmas, and a happy new year.
I know I am not asking much.
So please, Lord, hear me out on this.
Happy birthday Jesus.:)
Please gift everyone with love, peace and joy.
Fact: Giving yourself what is due is one of the greatest forms of self-love.
And that includes the respect, consideration and compassion you willingly give to others.
Ok, I know some of you may raise eyebrows because you’ve gotten used to putting yourself and your needs and wants last, thinking that others will always be more important than you.
Maybe because of how you were raised before.
Or how others judged you when you focused on yourself back then.
Or how the society romanticizes personal sacrifice.
Whatever your reason may be, please take note that you don’t have to embrace them.
Take this to heart: you are very much deserving of the best things in life, as much as everyone else, regardless of what you’ve been through or going through at the moment.
And you don’t deserve to be treated less of a person ever because your value does not depend on anything or anyone else but you.
You call the shots. You know your worth. You know what’s best for you.
Your life might not be perfect now and you might be struggling but hey, you are still amazing in your own way.
You, reading this now, have made it this far.
Celebrate yourself and your progress.
By doing so, you won’t allow yourself to just settle for anything less.
No, you are not a spare tire. You deserve to be chosen first, to be the only choice, most especially when it comes to romantic relationships. You are not meant for meantime flings or when it’s convenient or if a specific need which you can fulfill, arises. You are meant to be honored and loved for who and what you are in your current space and state, and be made a priority.
2. You don’t deserve to put your needs and wants last
You matter as much as everyone else. And you can’t really give what you don’t have. So it’s best and very much ok to fill your own cup first so you can come from a space of overflow. Be kind enough to yourself and acknowledge all the things that matter to you. You are worthy of all those and more. Stop basing your worth on how much you can sacrifice for others because that’s not exactly the case. You weren’t born to always just give way and suffer anyway.
3. You don’t deserve to hold yourself back
You are worth every risk you wish to take. Be brave enough to face your greatest fears and give yourself that fighting chance to go out of your comfort zone and conquer the unknown. Don’t let your self-doubts and opinion of others stop you from becoming the person you’re meant to be. You only have this one chance to make a lasting impact in this lifetime so give yourself just that.
4. You don’t deserve to treat yourself unkindly
Beating yourself up and continuously criticizing yourself won’t allow you to grow in the process. Your negative words can cause you to spiral down and make you doubt yourself even more. Be willing to embrace your own limitations and work around them coming from a space of understanding, humility and love. Shower yourself with affirmations and be your own greatest fan. Even if things are not working out around you and others are not showing their support, you can still choose to motivate and validate yourself as you keep going and growing, no matter what.
5. You don’t deserve to give up on life
Life may be tough but you’re definitely tougher. All of your experiences have strengthened you to reach this point of your life. Never discount your progress and your ability to turn your life around. Know that struggling doesn’t mean you’re failing – it actually means you are trying your best to adapt to the situation on hand and rise above it there after. Take this time to look back and appreciate the numerous times you never thought you will survive but you did. This is just one of those. So keep the faith and hang on. Don’t give up on life, instead, give it all you got.
Being worthy of the best things in life is not based on achievements or status.
It’s based on your own perception and how much you truly love yourself.
Don’t let the ridiculous standards of others make you forget that reality.
At the end of the day, you still deserve to become your own #bestmeever , no matter what.
Be your own greatest fan.
That’s not being narcissistic. That’s self-love.
Please. Don’t ever limit yourself when it comes to giving yourself what is due:
Unconditional love. Understanding. Compassion. Kindness. Appreciation.
The question is: when was the last time you did just that?
Ok, if it’s been a while, know that you aren’t exactly alone.
You see sometimes, when life gets hard, we forget how important it is to give ourselves the kind of consideration and love we willingly give to others who matter to us.
However, know that no matter what you’ve been through or going through at the moment, those really don’t determine your worthiness or define your value.
You know what’s best for you…so give yourself just that.
This line encapsulates it fully:
It’s ok to consider your own needs and wants too.
Because you matter just as much as everyone else.
Given that, it’s very important to stop treating yourself unfairly so that you get to grow in harmony with your own #bestmeever .
Heres the thing: you weren’t born to just to baby sit for everyone else around. You weren’t born just to work your ass off to pay the bills. You deserve to have time for yourself and spend it no matter how you want to, guilt-free. You don’t need to explain to others why you took that long vacation or when you decided to spend the weekend reading books in your bedroom. You have the right. And you deserve it.
2. Minimizing your own progress
Give credit to where it is due — to yourself, included. Reflect quickly: when was the last time you honored your progress? Don’t ever attach your happiness and fulfillment to the achievement of your end goal. You don’t have to postpone your appreciation for yourself until then. You can do it here and now, simply because if you looked back, you would realize how far you’ve gone. Remember: choosing to start a new journey is an achievement by itself. Continue celebrating yourself to stay inspired along the way.
3. Choosing to always play it safe
You’ve heard it time and again: growth is outside your comfort zone. That essentially means that you should be willing to take risks in order for you to be the person that you want to be. Holding back won’t get you anywhere in this life time. Give yourself that fighting chance to go for what you truly want: whether it’s all about starting a new career, learning a new skill in a new environment or speaking up and allowing yourself to take up space as you are. It may be really uncomfortable at first but the rewards are life changing.
4. Settling in unhappy, stagnant relationships
Life is too short to stay in any relationship that does not help you grow or make you happy. If you find yourself trying to justify the toxic relationship you have just because you’ve been in it for a long time, then this is your sign to reflect and realize that by staying, you aren’t exactly changing it. You could have done that a long time ago, but haven’t. There I said it. Maybe now it’s time for you to be honest with yourself and give yourself what you deserve: the chance to communicate openly with the person you’re in a relationship with and discuss how both of you would want to move forward, based on what will work best for your relationship and yourselves too. Sweeping issues under the rug don’t necessarily resolve them, you know.
5. Invalidating your emotions
Don’t be scared to be honest about how you feel. It’s the only way you can process them fully. Do away with shame or self-judgment. You deserve to let yourself be and feel what must be felt so that you can discover the lessons each one is telling you. Know that every emotion, good or bad, helps you understand yourself on a deeper level, only if you let them unfold fully without any form of resistance. It’s ok to feel the way you do. How you deal with it moving forward given that, matters more.
Let me leave you with this thought for reflection:
Treating yourself fairly is never optional nor dependent on any other person, timing or situation.
It’s a personal choice to be made consistently and genuinely, every single day. every single way.
Hope you commit to making that choice for yourself whole heartedly.
Fact: You always choose to prioritize what truly matters to you.
Also a fact: sometimes we get distracted and we totally mess up our priorities.
I know, the irony of it all.
Don’t be disheartened though. You are not alone to begin with.
Admittedly, even I struggled with my priorities initially when things got more challenging than usual.
However, as I aged and gained more and more experience, I realized that choosing what to prioritize became easier.
Maybe because through the years, I have learned to recognize and accept what really are in alignment with my core values and those which are not.
That totally made the process of elimination way easier.
However, I am not telling you to hold off setting your priorities until you reach my age (I just turned 44 last August 12).
I am telling you that by choice, you can see beyond the distractions and focus on what truly matters most in the long run.
Take this time to quickly reflect:
What overwhelms you at the moment?
What is making you focus on them?
What do you think can you do otherwise to resolve them instead?
By recognizing and understanding what distracts you, you are able to deal with them better and allow you to navigate through your own journey with the greatest of ease minus the excess baggage.
Allow me to share with you the 5 things I have chosen to prioritize upon decluttering my thoughts and my space, something which you can do now as well in yours.
Here’s the thing: nothing else will matter and nothing can prosper if you don’t take care of yourself. You are just as important as everyone else around you. Never put your own needs and wants last. Always take time to practice self-care, no matter how busy or challenging life gets. It won’t take much to have a break, pamper yourself, go for a walk or do what you love in between your hectic schedules. Don’t ever feel guilty for giving yourself what is due: that is the love and care you willingly give to others along the way.
Life is too short to spend it unhappily doing things you don’t like, being with people who don’t inspire you to be your best or staying in a place or situation which does not spark joy or growth. You don’t have to ask for anyone else’s approval before you finally choose to go for what truly makes your heart skip a beat. For as long as you are willing and able to take responsibility for yourself and your happiness, by all means give it a go. You are worthy of that smile on your face and in your heart.
3. Self-Improvement
You are never too young or too old to learn a new skill, work on yourself and be the person you’re meant to be. Stop giving yourself excuses and start giving yourself new found inspiration to take that first step to upskill or get to know yourself on a deeper level. Unlocking your potential was never based on a singular time frame. All you have to do is make that choice now, and fully commit to it no matter what.
4. Nurturing quality relationships
I always say: it’s ok to outgrow people and relationships. Not everyone has to play a part in your next chapter. Not because you’re evil or they’ve turned bad, but simply because you no longer on the same page. Some people are not meant to stay in your life in the long run and that’s ok. What matters is you learn from them the valuable lessons you need moving forward. This was one of my key reflections during my two-week birthday hiatus: I truly feel grateful with who I have left in my space as the ones who left have made room for new people of true value to occupy. Everything happens for a reason so it’s very important to surround yourself with the right people.
5. Savings For The Future
I know at times we tend to live in the moment and spend like there’s tomorrow. However, please take note that it’s never too early or too late to actually prepare for your future too. Go get that insurance fund, open that savings account, buy properties that appreciate in value, invest wisely…do what you must so that you grow your earnings even through the rainy days. It’s not about fully depriving yourself along the way; it’s about proper allocation and understanding of the real value of saving for the kind of future you want for yourself and your loved ones.
I guess my birthday leave did do wonders for me as I got to sit down and blog about my realizations in terms of my priorities.
Hopefully this blog helps you to manage yours, way before your next birthday comes along.
Yup, your time is now.
Redirection, not rejection.
How many times have you heard that?
But it’s quite true.
Good or bad, everything has a purpose.
And that includes situations which at a glance, seem like failure, a mistake, missed opportunity or something very regretful.
However, in the long run, that fateful curve ball proved to be a blessing in disguise.
Take this time to reflect:
When was the last time you got rejected?
How did things turn out eventually?
I know. At the onset of any rejection, pain is inevitable.
However, once we get to embrace it and intentionally try to understand the purpose behind it, we begin to discover silver linings we never thought initially existed.
And yes, you can always start all over again, this time not from scratch but from rich, meaningful experience.
Know that in this lifetime, you will experience a number of rejections that will actually re-direct you towards the right path as you become the person you’re meant to be: your own #bestmeever .
Here are 5 times rejection can turn to redirection:
I am sure that when you were younger, a lot of times you have heard your mom and dad say “NO” so sternly when you were asking for something, may it be a toy, a sleep over at a friend’s house or an increase on your allowance. And back then, it felt that it was coming from a space of being too mean and unreasonable and that it was meant to punish you for things you don’t even know you whether you were guilty of or not. But here’s the tea: it wasn’t all those you assumed. Their “NO”s back then were meant to protect you and teach you the value of what truly matters most as you grow up: taking responsibility, making the most of what you have while working hard for what you want. I began to realize all those as I aged and help raise my nephews and nieces. However, what I am doing differently now is that I talk to them in a level they could understand and not use my age or the tone of my voice as the source of my authority. Remember: a NO coming from a loving space will always be embraced fully with the least or no resistance.
2. When you didn’t fit in during your time in school
During our younger years, we tend to prioritize belongingness over our own self-worth and happiness. I mean seriously, how many times have you tried fitting in back then that led you to compromise your own beliefs and values? However, as we grow older, we realize that being rejected then, just because maybe you were seen to be different, or you had different sets of views and opinions, did not make you less deserving to take up space as you are. Looking at it now, being able to uphold your own amidst a sea of people who just conform to fit in is an achievement by itself. It was teaching you about your own value and how you can inspire others to embrace themselves whole and love themselves fully, no matter how others may respond to them. Belongingness starts from within. It’s all about being one with yourself, no matter what.
3. When your heart got broken by someone
I always believe that somewhere out there, someone is more than willing to love you the way you want him/her to. You don’t need to force yourself on anyone or shrink yourself to fit the limitations of your current relationship just to make it work. Don’t let one heart break stop you from finding (and being) the love you deserve. You will always end up with someone better after learning how you can love yourself more from your last heart break. Yep, it’s leading you to your biggest breakthrough yet.
4. When you did not get accepted for a job you applied for
There will always be a point in our lives where in we set our sights too much on that single job that we thought will change our career trajectory completely only to end up disappointed by not landing on it. However, we forget the important lessons the rejection is teaching us: that there is still room for improvement, that there’s something better in store for us and that we need to be willing enough and humble enough to work on ourselves as we pivot. And those very lessons, once embraced fully, will take us to places we never imagined. Remember: you may not have gotten the job you initially wanted, but that never means you’re not qualified to end up where you truly deserve. Trust the process. Take it from someone who has experienced so many rejections before finding and living my life’s purpose daily. And it was one hell of a ride, but definitely worth it. At times I just find myself uttering “Oh, that’s why…” and can’t help but smile in the process.
5. When you said “NO” to yourself
You know what’s best for you. So if you’re coming from that space, for as long as you’re willing to take responsibility, saying “NO” to yourself becomes an empowering experience instead. Most especially during times you are tempted to compromise your values and wellbeing, being firm with your decision may feel too harsh at first since you’re doing it to yourself. But hey, look at the bigger picture and realize how important having discipline is over temporary convenience or pleasure. You can postpone that travel. You can quit that job. You can stop chasing that person. You know when you’ll be ready. You know when you’re able to forgive. You know your own metrics of success. You know what makes you happy. Never feel the need that you’re depriving yourself by respecting your own timelines and values despite the pressure coming from others. And if people reject you because of that, it’s on them, not you. Because every NO you say coming from a space of self-awareness and love, is a YES towards your own growth.
I always believe that everything that is meant for you will always find its way and flourish no matter what.
Keep that in mind and keep that close to your heart.
Whatever space you’re in now, you’re still on your way to becoming your own #bestmeever .
Patience is a virtue.
Perhaps one of the most popular quotes in this lifetime.
It does hit hard in a fast-pace environment we have gotten used to through the years.
Ever felt you have so little time on your hands?
Barely enough for you to enjoy life fully, forcing you to rush everything.
However, life was never meant to be lived in a hurry.
Each one of us has a unique journey, a different timeline towards becoming our own #bestmeever.
And we must embrace that whole heartedly.
Only then can we fully appreciate the space we are in.
When we allow ourselves to take up space as we are.
So take this time now to reflect: when was the last time you became impatient over something?
Waiting for important results?
A long-awaited trip?
A much-deserved promotion?
Someone changing for the better?
Whatever has caused you to become highly frustrated over the seemingly long delays , please take note that if you look at those things closely, they are beyond your control. So yeah, no point of stressing over them, simply because doing so won’t even change a thing.
I know that probably knocked some sense to you and hopefully as I share this blog post, the entire experience of reading through it changes you for the better.
You already know that it will take some time for something you truly want to happen. So why constantly stress yourself on focusing how long it will take? Remember, the waiting time does not shorten itself based on how much you stress over it. It gets shorter when you leave it as is and go on with your life, as life does not technically wait for anyone. Don’t waste the chance to grow in harmony with it.
2. Divert your attention towards things (and people) you love
Waiting for the next big thing for you does not mean your life must come to a pause too. Consider this as your much needed time off to focus on the people and things you love most. Spend time with your family. Play with your pets. Pursue that passion project. Remember, you become more patient with things (and people) that make your heart smile and feel good about yourself as you enjoy the moment with them.
3. Anticipate the value of having to patiently wait
Humility. Commitment. Compassion. Hope. Some of the important things you learn along the way. Embracing the waiting game whole heartedly allows you to see the value of being patient with yourself and your own journey. When you see something as a growing experience, you allow yourself to be more patient towards it.
4. Take time to upskill
You only stop growing when you allow yourself to be held back by the circumstances surrounding you. So choose to continuously invest on yourself and your growth, so that instead of stressing over things beyond your control, you get to channel your energy and focus to making yourself better. The waiting game then becomes a springboard for your own breakthroughs and success.
5. Reframe your mindset
Greatness takes time. It will all be worth it. I am learning and growing as I wait. Time is on my side. Trusting myself and the process. Just some of the things you can take to heart as you view your situation differently. Mind you though, you get real results when you actually believe these thoughts fully.
Whatever space you’re in now, I hope after reading this, you become more patient towards yourself and your journey.
Know that you are exactly where you’re meant to be.
And you will always be just in time.
Just be patient.
Time is gold.
Indeed.
So how many of you grew up seeing that quote posted on your class room wall?
Or as a favorite answer back then when asked about one’s favorite saying?
Can’t blame them, guys. It’s indeed a very powerful saying.
So much truth to it.
After all, everything else will be meaningless : your wealth, your health, your accomplishments and all other things you hold close to your heart if you don’t have time to spare to enjoy them.
The question now is: how do you spend yours?
Reflect accordingly: where do you devote much of your time to?
While you’re at it, ask yourself this: where do you think you need to focus on instead?
Tough decision, if I may say, if you’ve already gotten used to doing the same thing over and over again.
But hey: life isn’t supposed to be lived in a routinary manner.
You deserve more.
To enjoy life to the fullest as you become the person you’re meant to be.
Your own #bestmeever .
And the only way to achieve that is to find time for things which really matter in the long run.
Mind you, regular is relative so it’s up to you if you want to do it on a daily, weekly or monthly basis.
Start with what can be comfortable for you then gradually improve on the frequency and quality of your focused moments.
Anyway, here they are:
1.) Time to go offline
Unplug to recharge. This simply means taking a mandatory break from social media. You don’t need to wait for a special occasion like the Holy Week or a life-changing event to make that hard stop. Don ‘t be afraid to miss out on what’s going on in the digital space as you allow yourself to embrace the reality in front of you. Life outside of social media will always be more meaningful and beautiful. Trust me, while I utilize my social media platforms for my coaching practice , I mindfully ensure that I do hard stops at the end of the day as I lay my phone and laptop to rest. That allows me to do my meditations and become 100% present in my current space.
2.) Time for self-care
I have always been a very strong advocate for wellness and wellbeing. So it’s very important for me (and for you dear reader as well) to always find time to take care and pamper yourself. You deserve it. It doesn’t have to be grand always, but hey if you have extra to splurge on, why not? What I am saying is that self-care can be in different forms such as having breaks in between your work schedule, staying away from toxic people or treating yourself to a massage. Remember: it’s your responsibility to make yourself feel a little bit better. On my end, I make sure to reward myself at the end of each and every single day, no matter how it went. And by rewarding I mean whether getting my favorite chocolate or allowing myself to watch an extra episode on Netflix. After all, making it through a day is an achievement by itself.
3.) Time for self-improvement
Question: when was the last time you invested on yourself and your growth? You are the best investment you can ever make so always find time to learn a new skill or get to know yourself on a deeper level. Never be too busy with work that you forget how important it is to fuel your own growth, whether that means embarking on a self-discovery journey with a professional or widening the skill set on your resume. Go for what you think will benefit you in the long run, inside and outside of work. I always put much value on learning continuously so this year, I am planning to go back to graduate school to study once more…after 10 years since I finished my Masters degree in UP Diliman. Excited though for this new adventure.
4.) Time to build and nurture relationships
No man is an island and your relationship with others matter as much as your relationship with yourself. So always find time to be with people you love and make each and every moment meaningful and memorable. Even at your busiest days, find time to at least text or call to remind them that they are thought about despite the craziness of your schedule. Open yourself up to possibilities of building your network also as you meet other people and build new relationships which can be of great value in the long run.
5.) Having your own ME Time
Before anything else, stop judging yourself. Having your own ME Time is never selfish. It’s a must. Never let anything or anyone make you feel otherwise. You, as much as everyone else, deserve to give yourself undivided attention and 100% love. How you want to spend your time for yourself is truly up to you. Whether you choose to meditate, travel, visit a new place, pursue a hobby — do what makes your heart and soul smile happily. I make my evenings as my regular ME Time, where I take off my coaching hat and just let myself be. And I tell you, it’s one of the best ways to rejuvenate at the end of a long day as I cuddle with my fur babies and watch my favorite series on Netflix while chatting with friends and loved ones on the side.
I hope reading this helps you realize what you’ve been missing out on your schedule.
One thing to take to heart today:
If it matters, make quality time for it.
Because you can.
Delayed, not denied.
This is your sign. So yes, you can relax now.
I know that sometimes when things don’t go as planned, we tend to feel stressed and overwhelmed.
That’s a normal reaction.
However, the key here is to not dwell on things beyond your control.
Yes, time to grow up honey.
For all you know, it’s not really as bad as it seems.
Greatness takes time so maybe the delays are merely preparing you for your best days ahead.
You’re still on your way to becoming your own #bestmeever .
You just have to trust yourself and the process more.
I know the waiting game can such be a painful, anxiety-filled experience at times.
Been there. Been that.
But still, here I am. Yup, I survived that. And so much more.
Fact: You can’t control everything and that’s perfectly fine. Be comfortable with your current space. It is what it is. And there’s a beautiful reason behind it. You just have to be patient enough to uncover the real purpose behind the delays. Give yourself that chance to grow by embracing what is here and now with little or no resistance at all. You are exactly where .you’re meant to be
2. Intentionally seek for silver linings
There’s always something good, somewhere, I always tell myself when I feel stuck or impatient. Here’s the thing: you can only discover the blessings in disguise when you no longer let yourself be overwhelmed by your own disappointments . Taking that to heart, come from a space of possibilities as you look at the delays that are happening in your life now. What are they teaching you? What better outcomes can they lead to? Reflect.
3. Be comfortable with pausing
Here’s the thing: even if you’re not moving forward, even if you stay still, you’re still growing. There is so much beauty in letting yourself pause as you reflect and recalibrate so you can be in full alignment with what and who you’re meant to be. Delays give you that beautiful opportunity to reconnect within and realize what really matters more in the long run. Make your pause purposeful.
4. Invest on yourself and your growth
Even during delays, life goes on. So can you. So make the most of the waiting time by working on yourself, whether you take personal development courses, level up your fitness game or upskill, what is important here is that you strive to become better so that regardless of what awaits you moving forward, you’ve still grown. You will always be the best investment you can make so take delays as your sign to make yourself even better.
5. Count your blessings
Delays can mean that you’re actually working on something bigger, something greater. Don’t let the long wait make you forget how blessed you are: you made it this far, you have new insights to help you move forward, and you still have a choice on how to go about your next chapter accordingly. These are just some of the things that you may want to acknowledge and focus on alongside many others that have inspired you through the years. Even as you wait, you are still blessed. Remember that.
Delays will always be there but please remember that: so is hope.
Hold on to what truly matters most:
that no matter how long, and whatever it takes, whatever is meant for you will find its way.
Honesty is the best policy.
I think we all grew up with that quote.
Whether it’s posted near the blackboard inside our classroom or written on a random page of our journal, we are oftentimes reminded of the true value of being honest in our lives.
Which in fact is quite valid because practicing honesty builds integrity and credibility, things we need in order to fully succeed in life. And trust me, you wouldn’t want to sacrifice those in the long run.
Sadly though, not all people welcome honesty with open arms. At times, no matter how well-meaning a person is, his/her honest remarks are taken as an attack.
While the issues and experiences of others are theirs to carry (which actually determine how they see the world and react to it, your message included), you should not burden yourself by doubting your actions if your intentions are pure.
At the end of the day, you know yourself best and you deserve to be honest not only with your words but also on how you choose to live life in general.
Take to heart though that your privilege goes the same for others and the key here is to practice respect while communicating honestly as we set and maintain necessary boundaries.
Think about the last honest conversation you had: how did it go?
Did the other party take it openly?
Or were you accused of being heartless, insensitive and outright rude?
While you can’t control the way others will react towards your honesty, you can always fine tune your way of delivering your message from your authentic self.
Here’s how you can be honest without being rude:
Most of the time, people get angry when caught off by surprise. Prevent this by preparing the person as you ask for permission if you can give your honest opinion. This gives the other party the time to think and consider his current space as to whether he is receptive towards it or isn’t ready at the moment. Either way, it will also give you an idea on whether to proceed or park it first to avoid conflict.
2. Clarify your intentions.
In order to avoid any form of misconception, it is important to state your reasons why you want to have that honest conversation and which space you’re coming from. Doing so allows the other party to loosen up and feel more safe and at ease to receiving your honest feedback.
3. Deliver your message mindfully.
How you structure your sentences and your choice of words can affect your delivery’s impact. Don’t forget your tone of voice and body language too. My tip here is that: if you were going to say the same thing to your 5 year old self, how will you do so coming from a space of love and genuine concern? Start from there. P.S. be clear and concise so that the key message doesn’t drown along the way.
4. Take time to listen and ask for feedback.
Being honest is also a two-way street. So best if you lend your ears as you ask about the feelings of the other person concerned. Once more, assure the other person that you will be open to listening and receiving feedback, much like how he/she did. Never block off what the other person has to say and never anticipate it as a form of attack. Be humble enough to allow yourself to know the impact of your message. Clarify and apologize if needed.
5. Ask how you can help out moving forward.
A gem of an effort indeed. It’s all about making the other person feel supported no matter what. Genuinely ask for what support you can offer and how can things be better for both of you moving forward. It’s not just about being able to say your piece, but rather using that conversation as a springboard to improving things around (and within) you .
Always remember that there’s nothing wrong with being honest.
However, know that you have a choice as to not come off as blunt by becoming more mindful of your words and actions.
That’s part of becoming your own #bestmeever .
