Written by Myke Celis

September 13, 2022

“I’m lost.”

Perhaps one of the most dreaded things to say in this lifetime.

And I can’t blame you at all.

In fact I feel you.

Quite inevitably, once in a while, we experience bumps along the way as we course through life.

And these bumps can be quite terrifying at times, especially if they cause us so much stress and anxiety because suddenly we lose control of our journey.

This leads us to struggle even more, doing all that we can as we continuously resist the situation on hand.

However, more often than not, instead of resolving it, we find ourselves facing a dead end.

Yes, sadly we made everything worse by choice.

You see feeling overwhelmed can wreck havoc in one’s decision making skills as one becomes engulfed in negative emotions.

That’s when we find ourselves feeling lost and confused. Unhappy. Frustrated. And very much stuck in the space we wanted to get away from to begin with.

This actually applies to different aspects of one’s life: whether you feel you’ve hit a dead end in your career, find yourself wondering if you made the right decision in pursuing your passion, settling in a relationship that does not seem to help you grow — these are some of the things that you may have encountered along the way and one way or another, you felt so uncertain on how to go about everything next.

Well, don’t fret. Allow me to share with you the 5 things you can do when you’re feeling lost and confused:

1.) Pause

Yep. Stop. For a while. It’s ok. You don’t have to do anything. Contrary to popular belief, even as you pause, you’re actually growing. Because pausing allows you to ground yourself and think. It allows you to see what you need to see, oftentimes set aside as you focus too much on the stress and burden the challenge in front of you brings. Remember, things can only get worse if you act based on impulse so never let your negative, heightened emotions get in your way.

2.) Do a mental dump

Note: you feel lost and confused at times because there are so many things on your mind as of the moment. Unburden yourself by listing them all down. Take 15 minutes of your time and just let your thoughts flow. Don’t edit yet. What is important is that you get to see everything that’s actually taking space in your head. Because eventually, you will realize that not everything there deserves that much attention.

3.) Identify your priorities

Looking at your list, ask yourself this: what do I need to focus on now that will be life changing for me? Group the items you’ve listed down: what you can do away with, what can wait and what needs to be focused on now. Note: not everything has to happen at the same time. Limit your choices to 3 and then rank them accordingly. My take: choose what will bring in the most happiness to you. That has always worked for me.

4.) Focus on what you can control

I have always been an advocate of over all wellness and well being and that means doing away with anything (or anyone) that stresses you unnecessarily. Check on the things you have control or influence on. Then ask yourself this: what can I immediately do to maximize my control or influence over this matter? By strategically narrowing down your focus, you are able to unburden yourself with the unwanted pressure of making things happen all at once.

5.) Let things be

Feeling lost and confused can be such a humbling yet empowering experience as you discover more about yourself. It’s part of your #bestmeever journey actually. So for as long as you’ve already done what you could with all that you have, based on your priorities and the things you can control — that’s more than enough. Give yourself a pat on the back and wait for things to unfold beautifully. Trust yourself and the process. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be: a temporary pitstop.

There you have it guys. The next time you feel lost and confused, stop resisting it.

Instead, embrace it and grow from the experience.

Because by choice, you can.

And until you’re feeling sure again, don’t decide on anything just yet.

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