Good or bad, each and every experience teaches you the lessons you need in life.
One of my favorite things to say during interviews and talks.

Because it just rings so true, in so many ways.

I know though for a fact that it’s easier to absorb and learn lessons through good times, but the bigger question is: how do you respond when things don’t go as planned?

Be honest with yourself now: what do you do exactly when faced with uncertainty and seemingly unfavorable situations?

Do you become angry?

Do you resist them strongly?

Do you panic and breakdown?

Or do you blame others for your situation?

These are just some of the common reactions of people who are caught off guard and swept away by their heightened emotions.

However, the key here is to let the emotions settle down first to reveal the true life lessons underneath the challenging times encountered.

Seemingly difficult at first but very much possible by giving yourself enough time and space to just breathe and let yourself be.

Remember: unless it’s a matter of life and death, not everything has to happen all at once so stop overthinking and stop over reacting.

There I said it.

So now you can focus on what really matters most: the value of challenging experiences in your life as you see each one of them in a different light.

Sharing with you the 5 life lessons hard times are teaching you:

  1. Everything is temporary.

Nothing is permanent in this world, including tough times. Whatever it is you’re going through right now, no matter how hard, it will eventually come to pass. Think about this: would the thing or situation stressing you now still matter in a year’s time? I am so sure not as much, or not at all. It’s not the end of your journey; it’s just part of your story. And you’ll be ok eventually.

2. Surrendering does not mean you’re losing.

You can’t control everything. And you shouldn’t even try to. There is beauty in letting go and letting things be. For as long as you’ve given your best, with all that you have and all that you are, that’s more than enough. As you trust yourself and the process more, you actually win in life because you allow yourself to be taken to where (and become what) you’re meant to be. And yes, your #bestmeever journey won’t always be easy…but it will definitely be worth it.

3. Real relationships reveal themselves during hard times.

I think one of the biggest blessings in disguise that tough times carry is that it makes you realize who is really there for you and who is meant to stay in your life when all of this is over. Painful realization yes, especially if the people you were counting on turn their back on you. However, at least it gives you a clear picture of where you stand in their life. You can do away with people who didn’t even bother asking you how you were, people who didn’t listen to your side of your story and people who simply vanished into thin air. They are not your people, So make sure you don’t invite them in your space when things go well eventually, even if they invite themselves in again. Quality over quantity and I am beyond confident that your life can go on without them. Because based on what they’ve shown, they were never with you in this journey to begin with.

4. You get to know yourself better when times are hard.

You are stronger than you think you are and more resourceful and capable than you ever imagined. With nothing else to lose as you hit the lowest point in your life, you begin to explore possibilities bravely and that can lead you to your next breakthrough. It’s all about tapping into your inner greatness, because truth be told, you have everything within to help you get through and succeed in this lifetime.

5. You can change for the better when you’re not bitter.

Never to late to embrace change. Allow yourself to stop resisting it as you let time and space take the lead. Everything will fall into place once you have cleared your mind and heart from the things you need to let go of, as you welcome what needs to take up space so you can start all over again on a better, happier note. As they say, growth can start off messy at first. And that’s ok.

Hopefully this blog post makes it easier for you to embrace hard times this time around.

Always remember that you are exactly where you’re meant to be right now:
to learn the important life lessons to allow you to live life happily and fully.

No pain, no gain.

We grew up hearing this, time and again.

And at times, I must admit, I can’t help but agree with this.

While I wouldn’t mind having a smooth sailing life to begin with, I have embraced the fact that life in general has its own twists and turns.

Most of which are beyond our control.

Which actually makes sense to just let things be and embrace the lessons each and every not so good experience that life may bring instead of getting anxious and stressed.

I know. That won’t be a walk in the park.

However, it’s very much possible.

To see the silver lining in every painful experience we have.

And change for the better as we anchor on all the lessons learned.

Allow me to share with you the 5 painful life experiences that will shape you.

1.) A death of a loved one

This one is inevitable. As much as we want to be with people closes to our hearts, we just can’t. Death is something we cannot predict, more so stop permanently. It’s as natural as the sun rising daily, and as day turns to night. While the intensity of the pain may vary due to the cause or timeliness of the death, each death teaches us an important lesson: how to fully let go and be at peace eventually with the decision. It may take time and a whole lot of effort, however, full, genuine acceptance of things, people and situations which are no longer there are crucial for us to move on and forward when life throws a curve ball. It also teaches us the important lessons of valuing relationships and making the most of each and every moment, as we can’t really say when it’s our time to go (or let go of someone). Treat every single day as if it was your last. Very good reminder indeed.

2.) A major break up

Ouch. I feel you. Haha! I know, this can wreck havoc in one’s emotional state especially if you have always believed that you will end up with the person who broke your heart. Well take note of this: it doesn’t mean that if someone broke your heart, you won’t have your happily ever after someday. Because trust me, you will. And that’s the important lesson a break up teaches you: that you have to be patient enough to get what you truly deserve. That you need to love yourself first so that others will love you just as much. And when you’re able and ready, the right one for you will come eventually. You just have to be the love that you want to receive.

3.) A significant failure

I know it can be so frustrating when you work so hard on something and not get the desired results. Whether it’s a wasted opportunity, a competition lost, a business that went bankrupt … they all are teaching us the same thing : that we can always do better. Knowing that there’s room for improvement should inspire us to continue journeying towards our best . Remember, it doesn’t end when you lose ; it only begins when you embrace the new lessons learned and apply them there after.

4.) A betrayal

Experiencing something that’s totally unexpected like a betrayal can hurt big time. More so if it comes from a person that’s close to your heart. One can’t help but feel immense hurt, anger and pain when trust is broken. But trust me, that had to happen in order for you to learn very significant lessons in self-worth and discernment. Betrayals teach you to become more mindful about the relationships you keep and the people you allow in your space. It teaches you about what you deserve and how to value yourself more. And those lessons will go a long way as you meet various people in your life time. It pays to know.

5.) Outgrowing people, things and situations

There will come a time that certain relationships with people, things and circumstances will no longer spark the same joy or ignite further inspiration. That can be such a heart breaking experience to realize that something familiar is slowly fading to oblivion. Whether it’s a childhood friend, a place you grew up with or something you owned, letting go can be so difficult. However, it’s a must because it teaches you that life goes on. Not everyone or everything must play a part in your next chapter. It’s ok if it ends there. It already served its purpose. Be grateful that it happened. Then bravely turn the next page as you welcome new people and experiences in your space. You’ll be fine.

I hope that by reading through these you got to evaluate and appreciate your pains more.

Truth be told, each pain serves a beautiful purpose.

As you journey towards your own #bestmeever .

So embrace them fully, whole heartedly.

Because there’s so much to gain.

Sigh.

That’s perhaps the only thing we can do whenever things don’t go as planned.

I mean, I know one way or another you can relate to any or all of these:

….ever set a goal worked so hard on it, which led you to be just one step away from achieving it e.g. a promotion at work, a financial target, winning a competition etc,…but then suddenly the biggest plot twist occurs and your journey suddenly gets cut short?

….did you ever find yourself in a near-perfect relationship with your seemingly ideal guy and then without warning you find your fairy tale love story ending abruptly?

…planned your dream vacation and then suddenly it got cancelled because of unforeseen events beyond your control?

I can actually go on and on with this list but heym you already know what I am talking about.

Yup, it’s a fact: things don’t always work out the way we want them to.

Which in turn leaves us feeling angry, sad, worried and a whole lot anxious about what’s next for us, totally forgetting our own #bestmeever journey.

Reason being is that we focus too much on what went wrong instead of seeing the beautiful silverlinings behind seemingly tragic ends.

Allow me to share with you the 5 reasons why things don’t work out initially.

1.) You are being saved from greater pain or danger

Yes. God (or the Universe) might have just saved your ass from something more severe hidden under your story’s plot. Ever heard of the people who got stuck in traffic on their way to work at the World Trade Center during the 9/11 bombing? Or the guy who missed the fatal flight to Kenya? Yep, you probably know a lot of those kind of stories. And yes, they’re real.

2.) You are given the chance to improve yourself even more

Not yet does not mean never. So how amazing is it to know that there’s still room for improvement and you’re given yet another chance to maximize it? It’s no secret that Pia Wurtzbach joined the National Pageant thrice, each time becoming better, before she won and got to represent the country in the 2015 Miss Universe, where she bagged the crown. What if you’re a Pia in the making? I know that made you smile. Allow.

3.) It’s allowing you to focus on yourself and recalibrate

Have you been so gung-ho when it comes to chasing your goals? Feeling tired, pressured and burned out? Things not working out in your favor allow you to step back, pause and re assess the space you’re in as you take that much needed break from it all. That’s actually the healthy (and humbling ) way to go about things: allow yourself to rest as you let the dust settle so you can clearly define what’s next for you. Yup, there’s life after chaos of whatever kind. You’ll survive and thrive.

4.) You learn important lessons you need

Good or bad, experiences help you grow by allowing you to learn important lessons you need in life. Ask yourself this each time things don’t go as planned: what is this situation teaching me? How can I apply the learning to my current space? You will be surprised on how smooth your life can be there after only if you take the lessons to heart.

5.) You deserve something (or someone) better

God knows better. Period. Someday you will meet that one person who will make you realize why you had to undergo so many heart aches and why all was worth it. Someday, you will look back and smile about lost opportunities and relationships that led you exactly to where you’re meant to be: happier and free. You just have to trust the process, do all that you can with all that you have, and know and believe that the best is yet to come. Soon!

So guys, if times are rough now, remember this:

Tough times are temporary.

All will be well eventually.

You just have to look beyond the challenging situations and realize that all will work out eventually.

Your journey is just beginning.

Now take a deep breath.

Because life goes on.

So can you.

Happy 41st birthday, Self!

Yes, I am now officially 41.

And come to think of it, it’s such a beautiful experience to be able to reach this age. I mean growing up, I never had an idea how it would look and feel like. But hey, here I am now, blowing my candle and adding yet another year to my life.

While others become worried as they age, I am actually having a grand time embracing the person that I am becoming: my own #bestmeever . Yes, I truly believe that the best is yet to come.

Thinking about it now, it was definitely a one-of-a-kind roller coaster ride towards becoming the person I am meant to be. I lost count of the number of ups and downs, the twists and turns and everything that happened in between. But hey, I am genuinely grateful for all of them because they all happened for a reason, and the core being is that all those were essential to my learning and growth.

Coming from honesty and humility, I am just so happy that at this point in time, I no longer feel anxious about what the future may bring. There’s freedom in trusting myself and the process as I let myself (and things) be.

I have to say, experience indeed is the best teacher. I wouldn’t be a credible coach now if I haven’t experienced all those in the past 41 years. And today, I would like to share with you the 41 life lessons I learned which molded me into the person that I am now.

Indulge!

  1. You can always love yourself more by choice, and it’s ok.
  2. Whatever you tolerate will eventually take its toll on you. So don’t if it doesn’t sit well with you.
  3. Never keep things to yourself. Speak up. Your personal freedom is more important than the reactions of others.
  4. You don’t have much time but you can always choose to make the most of what you have.
  5. To be different is a gift. Cherish it. Own it.
  6. You can be successful and unhappy or struggling yet happy. You have the choice to turn both around.
  7. What you truly deserve will always be better than what you initially wanted. Trust in God’s plan.
  8. Every pain has a purpose. You just have to stop resisting and start seeing things beyond the hardships,
  9. Your willingness to invest on yourself is commensurate to your willingness to grow. It’s a question of how much are you worth it?
  10. You don’t ever need to justify the wring doings of others. Allow yourself to feel hurt and acknowledge that space. You don;t have to deny that because you want to save a relationship.
  11. You can be independent, empowered and genuinely happy if you allow yourself to live outside of social and personal expectations.
  12. Don’t minimize your goals based on your experience. Create goals based on what you really want and get enough experience and enlightenment to work on them no matter how big they may seem at first.
  13. There’s more to life than just working to pay the bills.
  14. A seemingly bad ending can actually be a prelude to a beautiful beginning.
  15. If you’re not happy, then that’s not how the story ends yet.
  16. Learn to normalize calling people as colleagues, acquaintances or whatever fits them if they’re not really your friends.
  17. Your happily ever after is not based on a certain age, achievement or person. It’s based on what you truly feel within regardless of what you have or don’t have.
  18. Commitment requires 100%. Don’t settle for anything less than you deserve.
  19. Love comes unexpectedly. It pays off to always be ready.
  20. There is much value in pausing, stopping and starting all over again. They shouldn’t be perceived as negative delays.
  21. You are worth every risk you are willing to take.
  22. For as long as you’re happy and healthy, you can become wealthy.
  23. Feeling stuck at times can actually be a matter of choice.
  24. Your credibility and integrity are priceless. So don’t act cheap.
  25. Don;t sweat about things that won’t matter in 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days, 5 months or 5 years.
  26. It’s ok to love people from afar.
  27. Love is brave and proud. If it’s not, then that’s not love.
  28. There’s no limit as to how many times you want to start all over again and reinvent yourself, for as long as you are clear with your goals and objectives.
  29. You can’t be everything that the world expects you to be but you can always be your best and that’s more than enough.
  30. Don’t let anyone or anything question your genuine happiness. You know better.
  31. Struggling at times makes the whole journey even more rewarding.
  32. Don’t let the people who have hurt you turn you into a person that you are not.
  33. You are whole as is. Everyone who comes into your life is just a bonus.
  34. Acknowledging your feelings and being truly honest with yourself are superpowers.
  35. Everyone needs a coach. But there is a specific coach for someone.
  36. It’s ok to cut ties. You don’t have to stay for the sake of old times, because if things were still the same, then cutting them off wouldn’t be an option in the first place. People change. Feelings too. So can you.
  37. You don’t ever have to pressure yourself to conform just to be liked. You can be a disruptor and be loved.
  38. Taking care of yourself, your looks, your mental health and well-being is never optional or dependent on anything or anyone else.
  39. It’s ok to try and fail than to have a bunch of what if’s and what could have been’s.
  40. You can never be really ready but you can always choose to be brave enough now to at least try.
  41. Life goes on. It always does. So can you.

So there you go! I hope these life lessons resonate with you.

I look forward to learning more this year.

Thank you for celebrating my 41st birthday with me.

My heart is full.

As a whole, 2021 was a learning experience for me.

And that’s an understatement.

I mean I can’t say that it was a really awesome year because hey, the pandemic has taken a toll on all of us (mental health, relationships, business among others) and it’s not really easy for a travel bug like me to be oftentimes stuck at home because of travel restrictions during the lockdown.

On the other hand though, I am extremely grateful because to date, I am able to remain healthy and genuinely happy in my space and I am still blessed with a whole lot of opportunities to grow both on a personal and professional note. Taking these in consideration, I would say that 2021 was not that bad either.

Candidly speaking after seeing the big picture both ways, I totally believe that it taught me a whole lot of important life lessons which I need to take to heart as the new year approaches. I think they will all be quite useful as I (and you guys reading this) make our new year’s resolutions.

Allow me to share with you the 21 life lessons I learned in 2021 as we welcome the new year ahead:

  1. No matter what happens around me that is beyond my control, I can always choose how to react towards each.
  2. Tragedies and desperate situations bring out the best and worst in people. However, please take note that whatever comes out, is still a matter of choice.
  3. At times, pausing with one’s routine can make way for bigger progress , rather than forcing yourself into it.
  4. No matter how good you are or how pure your intentions are, there will always be people who will mock you and try to pull you down. Don’t ever let them dim your light. That’s how they react when blinded by their own pains and insecurities.
  5. Your personal pains and problems do not grant you the right to hurt other people just because you experienced the same before. That’s revenging on the innocent.
  6. Doing one small thing that leads you closer to your goals will always be better than just planning for bigger ones.
  7. You are free to celebrate yourself, your wins and your milestones, regardless of how people may react towards them. It’s all about you and they’re merely spectators to your growth. Consider it not as arrogance on your end but rather jealousy from theirs, as long as your intentions are clear.
  8. People will want to invest in you as much as you invest on yourself, your well-being and your growth.
  9. It’s not your environment or the situation you’re in that limits your growth; it’s your mindset and heart set.
  10. You don’t owe anyone any explanation each and every time you walk away from a toxic relationship or a space that does not bring out the best in you.
  11. You cannot blame others for situations you have caused yourself.
  12. There are no right or wrong decisions as long as you take responsibility for them because either way, you learn when you make yourself accountable.
  13. Never let money (or your issues about it) taint your reputation because it’s priceless to begin with.
  14. Admitting you’re not ok is one thing; doing something about it is another. It’s all about reaching out to the right people with full vulnerability and humility. You owe that to yourself.
  15. 3P’s that determine your progress during trying times: Patience, perseverance and passion.
  16. You spend the same amount of effort in worrying and acting on things: the first one gives you more problems to resolve, the second one, a solution to what you were complaining about.
  17. Keeping your word allows you to keep your integrity and credibility intact.
  18. Always be open about how you feel. You may not have that opportunity to share what’s inside the next time around.
  19. If you really want something, you will do anything and everything to make it happen. Your excuses represent your level of interest.
  20. Everything else becomes a little more difficult when you’re not healthy so treat your health and well-being more importantly
  21. Today is the best time to try. Tomorrow is the perfect excuse to try harder again if needed.

So there you go, I hope these life lessons help you in your personal journey towards becoming your own #bestmeever this coming 2022.

I look forward to journeying with you all and celebrating you and your growth along the way.

Thank you 2021 for the life lessons.

Happy New Year guys!

2022, we are ready.

Life Changing.

Best way to describe the COVID19 Pandemic.

And to this day, I still think that’s an understatement.

While in general it is seen as something destructive and evil because of the results it delivered world wide — we tend to forget that underneath them all are silver linings waiting to be discovered.

I have always believed that things happen for a reason and this entire situation is meant to change the way we look at things and ourselves (even life) in general.

Yes, it taught me a whole lot of valuable life lessons which I now take to heart.

Allow me to share with you my top 5 lessons the COVID19 pandemic taught me:

1.) Never take anything (or anyone) for granted

In an instant, lives are lost. Many became unemployed. We got locked down. Face masks and face shields became mandatory. With these sudden changes, I got to realize the things I was taking for granted: my freedom, my work, my health…among others. Such an eye opener. So best to show love and appreciation here and now. Make the most of today.

2.) Simple joys are real joys

Appreciate the small things. They bring you true happiness. Bonding with your loved ones. Being able to rest. Working from home. Having food on your table. How many times have we missed their true value? Larger than life if I may say. And priceless.

3.) We always have a choice

How we react or respond to the whole pandemic is a matter of choice. We can either see it as a dead end or as an opportunity to thrive. It’s a matter of allowing ourselves to accept the present scenario whole heartedly as we do away with resitance and grow with the flow instead. At the very least, you reading this now is a testament of your choices made: at the very least, to survive. And that will always be more than enough for now.

4.) Everyone can be a hero

Wherever you are, whatever you do, you can always make a difference during challenging times. No one is too big or too small to help and change lives. It’s all about being empowered within and building that sense of community so that no one gets left behind. And that’s such a beautiful space to be in: alongside people who chose to be the heroes that they truly are.

5.) Life goes on. And it can get better.

Life may not always seem perfect and things may not always happen as planned, but life goes on. And it can only get better when we allow ourselves to grow in harmony with it. It’s all about choosing to maximize each and every single day so that no matter what happens, we will have no regrets. These detours will lead us to beautiful destinations, one of which is towards our own #bestmeever .

There you go. So in your case, what has the whole COVID19 Pandemic taught you? Looking forward to hearing the lessons you’ve learned along the way.

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