You will always be the greatest investment you can make.
So true.
At the end of the day, it's all about you.
How you make your decisions, how you choose the people you choose to surround yourself with, how you keep your own self-worth intact.
It can be said that at times, how others see you (and treat you, mind you) is basically a reflection of how much work you put on yourself and how many things you actually do away with.
While the goal is not to please others with everything that you do, it is important to know and take to heart that your growth should also be on top of your list.
And that can look like feeling better about yourself, looking the part, achieving more and inspiring others along the way.
Not to mention that as you grow your worth as a person, other people will naturally gravitate towards you, allowing you to build new relationships, discover new opportunities and expand your reach and influence.
Sounds good huh?
1.) Invest in yourself
I just had to repeat this. Yes, it's that important. Take that class. Go on that vacation. Work out. Have that facial. Do whatever can help you improve yourself in all aspects. You deserve that. Remember, when you look good and feel good, you become more confident and desirable, not only to yourself but also in the eyes of others.
2.) Network
Allow yourself to expand your social circle and be intentional in meeting people who can add value to your life. I always say that you become the sum total of the 5 people you spend most of your time with so choose well. Maximize every event that you go to by making a wonderful impression on everyone that you meet, because who knows, someday, they might be the person (or they might introduce you to someone) that you need in your space. There's no room for shyness when growth is at stake.
3.) Be comfortable in saying NO
Saying NO does not make you a bad person. It only shows how you give importance to yourself and your boundaries. By not always being readily available, you teach others to respect your time and space, something which you really deserve to have to begin with. Make your YES just as precious as you are, always.
4.) Be willing to wait
Great things take time. So stop pressuring yourself or rushing to the next opportunity that comes along. Learn to discern what you deserve. Don't settle for less. You know what's best for you. And take to heart that what's meant for you will eventually find its way. You just have to be patient and enjoy the journey as you wait for what your heart truly longs for. Know your value.
5.) Let yourself be heard and recognized
You deserve to be heard and recognized by everyone else around you. Use your voice to influence others. Tap on your skills in writing, speaking or whatever you may be good at and share valuable pieces of insights and information for others to use and reflect on. Make a stand and inspire others to do the same as you use your voice to stir up discussions and mobilize inspired actions. Allow others to see a formidable leader in you.
So there. I hope these help you grow your worth so you will be able to take up more space as you become your own #bestmeever .
Trust me, your entire journey will be all worth it.
Just like you.
There will always be days which are less than perfect.
And that's perfectly normal.
Once in a while, life throws you a curve ball, totally unexpected, leaving you struggling and confused as you try to control the situation on hand.
That's part of human nature actually: wanting to be in control at all times, thinking that things should happen always the way we want them to.
But is that really the case?
Too much resistance at times can lead us to become frustrated when things don't turn out to be in our favor, making us doubt ourselves.
We then begin to question our skills, our worthiness, and everything around us that causes our self-confidence to slide down dangerously.
When this happens, we end up feeling not good enough. And trust me, that isn't exactly a nice space to be in.
You may ask: how can you feel good inside when everything else around you seems to be in total chaos and you're against all odds?
That's exactly the point: you are allowing the state of the things around you, become you. You are not what happens to you.
When situations seem unfavorable or people are treating you less than you deserve, when you focus on them, you amplify their impact on you.
What is key here is to recognize your need to become self-empowered so that you get to resolve that feeling of not being good enough.
1.) Remember that you have your own journey
Whenever you compare yourself with others or even your previous self (if you were doing good before), you rob yourself of the opportunity to grow in harmony with the now. You're being unfair to yourself that way. Instead, what you can do is acknowledge your current progress. While it may not be perfect now, celebrate the fact that you've made it this far and most probably you're still in time (and doing good) based on your own timelines and standards. Give yourself enough room to make mistakes and learn from them -- that's not exactly a bad thing, you know. Go and grow at your own pace, in your own space.
2.) Remember what you're good at
Whatever that's not working right now in your life, know that it's only one aspect, not the whole so don't ever let your results define you fully. Consider your journey and how far you've grown. Ask yourself this: what other things am I good at that can help me in my current space? Maybe it's a matter of changing approach or simply changing your focus in the meantime until you feel fully inspired again. Creative? Think of news ways to approach it. A good writer? Write an inspiring story about your set back. A speaker? Talk about it. You can always make the most of what happens to you for a s long as you don't let it define you.
3.) Consider it as a learning experience
Humbling, yet so empowering to know that there's still room for growth. Embrace that beautiful lesson; it's part of you as you become your own #bestmeever . Reflect on what you can improve on and who can help you in the process. Feeling not good enough is actually the push you need to step out of your comfort zone and commit to becoming your best. Don't let any negative emotion pull you down.
4.) Take a time off to celebrate yourself
You don't need to face everything all at once. Take a step back. Relax and ground yourself. It's not the end of the world, my dear. You may not feel that you're good enough in a particular space or for a particular person, but hey if you think long and hard about it, time and again, you have proven that otherwise. Try to write down the number of times you've succeeded in other matters. List down the number of people who have shown you love and inspiration. Note all the times you have felt proud of yourself. All those are beautiful justifications for you to move on and forward. Note to self: You've just encountered a hurdle. You're not stuck in a rut. Because you've risen above that challenge before. Time and again.
5.) Make a difference in someone else's life
You can always choose to lend a helping hand to those who have far less than you and have probably had things harder for them in general. Give yourself the same compassion you willingly give these people, You may feel small and insignificant now, but when you see the smiles on the faces of those you intentionally helped, that will change you. To feel different about yourself, allow yourself to make a difference in the lives of others. Because even in the smallest, simplest ways, like doing a favor or smiling or asking how they are --- those can be life changing for them...and you as well. Because you matter too.
At this point, after having said all these, I just want you to remember this:
You will always be more than enough,
And that's something good to hold on to, always.
You're more than enough.
Always.
I tend to repeat that time and again to help people who are suffering from low-esteem and doubting their self-worth.
And more often than not, it's because these people have redefined themselves with things, situations and associations, which don't really serve them well.
What is important to know now is that any description you put after the word "I AM" is very powerful so be careful what you affirm as your personal truth.
Yep, those things, can actually become your reality if you truly embrace them and believe them as is.
Such is the case with people who subscribe so much to the standards of others that they tend to measure their self worth based on the approval of others, which truth be told, should not be the case at all. Feeling guilty now? Kidding.
Yes my dear. Work is not life. You were not born to just earn money to pay the bills. You are meant to enjoy life to the fullest, with all that you are and everything that you allow yourself to become eventually. Your job title, your industry, your expertise...all those won't really matter in the long run. They don't make you better than the rest of the world. Because really, you're more than what you do.
2. Your relationships
It's not about who you know or who you're with that determines your self-worth: it's about who you choose to become alongside people who share your space. So do away with name dropping or banking on associations. Choose to be your own person as you create a name for yourself. You deserve to own your space and identity. Never borrow from anyone else.
3. Your achievements
While your achievements can take you further in life, your attitude can bring you closer to the hearts of those around you. You are more than the medals, the recognitions and success you have attained. And you should be comfortable with your own skin even if you haven't reached your full potential just yet. You have your own journey towards your own #bestmeever , and it's definitely special in it's own way. So celebrate yourself as you are, with all that you have. You deserve it.
4. Your past
It's over and done with. So why still hold on to it? You are not your mistakes, your failures, your trauma, your losses...and everything else that's part of your past. You are what you choose to do at present as you become the person you're meant to be: genuinely happy and free from yesterday's chapters. Just learn the lessons and do away with the associated definition of who and what you were. That's not you now, anyway.
5. Your money in your bank account
Fact: some of the happiest people I know have little money and the saddest ones are those who have so much. So don't ever let money define your self worth. It's not about how much money you have, burt rather, how much you've given in terms of time, effort and love that will linger in the minds of the people around you. So make your presence count instead because it's the greatest gift you can give. Just my two cents worth.
I'd like to end this post with this reminder:
Whoever you are at the moment, whatever you choose to become, you will always be worthy of the love, care and admiration that you willingly give to others.
Because like I said earlier, in case you've already forgotten,
you are more than enough.
Here’s an interesting fact:
At times, what really makes a goal hard to achieve is not the lack of skills nor opportunities.
It’s the lack of self-confidence.
That feeling of not being worthy, not being good enough.
These are walls we built by ourselves.
They hold us back from becoming the person we are meant to be: our very own #bestmeever .
Let’s face it: it’s not that easy to be truly confident when we all have experienced a lot of down times in our lives.
It’s over and done with. So why hold on to whatever painful experience you’ve had up to this day? You have a choice to start all over again as you learn from what initially broke you so you can have your own breakthrough. You’re not defined by your past; you’re defined by the choices you make there after.
Somewhere along the way, you have succeeded in your own right. Celebrate those wins. If you’ve done it before, why worry about not being able to achieve the same now?
You’ve survived and made it this far. So why doubt yourself? Wear your battle scars proud. And give yourself that much-deserved pat on the back.
What normally freaks us out is the fact that we don’t have a plan to back us up as we pursue our goals, coming from a space of unfamiliarity. By carefully listing down all your options and specific steps on how you can reach your goals, you become more confident in the process knowing that somehow, you have it all figured out.
Be your own best fan. Tell yourself all the words you long to hear. Know that you are truly great within, you just have to consistently remember that, no matter what. The thing is: you’re actually the best person to remind yourself too.
There you go. I hope that these tips will enable you to level up your confidence so you can finally pursue your dreams with the greatest of ease.
Enjoy your journey as you break free confidently!
